Bill and I celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary this weekend. We're very low-key about celebrating- something that I'm hoping to change about myself. I want to learn the Art and the Secret of Celebration- because I believe it whallops the Enemy when we all-out celebrate victories and milestones in our lives. (The Enemy of our Soul is the king of "raining on your parade").
But it was a good celebration- even if it wasn't exactly the most romantic. My parents took us all out for dinner, and it was great to have our two kids celebrate with us. I watched everybody as they talked around the table at the restaurant and I noticed so many things.
My mother, for instance, is the most amusing and hysterical person you have ever met. She is ...erhumpf...uh.... 80 years old ...ssshhh, and yet she told my 17 year old she wants to be his band's Agent, and get them bookings! What a hoot she is! Since she has battled depression and has raised five children with a minimum of the modern day resources of today, I say she is entitled to think exuberantly, and to Go For it! Book him at a big arena, mom!
My Dad was his usual self- assessing our progress, coaching us in our individual pursuits, ordering the best and the most interesting from the menu. My son was witty and bantering back and forth with his grandmother, and my daughter was looking beautiful and sweet, as 13 yr olds look in their glory.
My husband and I said the least because we were enjoying watching our kids with my parents. He doesn't have to say much for me to sense his peace and his enjoyment. It has never taken a lot to make my husband happy. (Lord, what did I do to deserve this man?!) He has patiently put up with my occasional tirades, my bursts of creative enthusiasm and the voyages I then take into the unknown. He will open the oven door with a sigh, and take out the dirty pots and pans that I hide in there when I can't get to them, and he'll wash them without a complaint. He will crack funny jokes to try to induce a better mood from me on those days that are a bit too long or too dark. He is a Renaissance man, of many talents, and fairly quiet about them.
Lately, hope has been arising in our spirits, and a sense of destiny- God's divine calling- is before us. He and I have "history" together, but we also have a destiny before us. That we have stayed in step with each other is amazing- but not when you think about the fact that we both long to stay in step with God most of all.
I was a pioneer girl, and am a spiritual mountain climber now. I've been a lot of things: afraid, adventurous, a student living abroad, a pastor's wife, a real estate agent, a teacher of the Word; I've been frustrated when I've been held back, and I've been excited about growth and change. I've journeyed with my husband for over 23 years, and he has seen me in a lot of different places, roles, conditions, crises, and moods. I celebrate the fact that he wants to see what's next in my life, as I can't wait to see what God does in his.
We're celebrating the progress of anything that rises above the ordinary- and LOVE is at the top of the list.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Friday, August 24, 2007
I Was a Pioneer Girl
I was a Pioneer Girl when I was young. Pioneer Girls was a cross between Bible Club and Girls Scouts, giving us fun things to do, scriptures to memorize, and leaders who mentored us. Each girl had a "pal" who was their special mentor. Mine was Mrs. Jonas- a pastor's wife with silver hair and a bright smile. I remember going to her house and baking with her one day. I don't think she ever gave me any specific talks on how to be a success or how to be a pastor's wife one day (which is what I did become)- but I do remember looking at her and thinking how strong she was, how confident and stable she was. I wanted to be like that.
What I remember most of all, about Pioneer Girls, was the theme song we sang every week. I'm not sure they sing this anymore- maybe it's too hokey and old fashioned for today's standards. But I haven't ever forgotten the song- or the message.
"Pioneers across the prairie, in the days of wagon trains,
Pressing On to New Horizons, in our hands, God's Precious Word...." (sung with a solemn, purposeful look on the face)
Somewhere in these last couple years, and specifically these last months, I have adopted into my vocabulary the phrase "onward!". I never noticed how often I said it or thought it or encouraged others with it until I began to read back my writing, my e-mails to others, my messages. If I didn't specifically say the word, I was certainly always thinking it as I encouraged people, as I encouraged myself- on those dark days- in the Lord.
I am a TRUE pioneer girl, and Mrs. Jonas would be proud of me. I have pressed onward when I would have liked to quit. I don't say this proudly or arrogantly- but hear me now, I do say this confidently. You have to KNOW what you are made of- the stock from which you've come. You've got to know that you're the type that will press onward, that you are of the "violent" group who hear the good news of the Kingdom's message, and "seize it".
"And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent take it by force." NKJV Matt 11:12
Better said, and explained, is the Amplified version:
12And from the days of John the Baptist until the present time, the kingdom of heaven has endured violent assault, and violent men seize it by force [as a precious prize--a [a]share in the heavenly kingdom is sought with most ardent zeal and intense exertion].
If you're "pressing on to new horizons" you are most certainly seeking with ardent zeal and intense exertion. And it should feel like you are. Flabby purpose and half-hearted goals are not the earmarks of a pioneer of Christ.
This past year felt like a cross country wagon train expedition. Indians came out of hiding and shot arrows at me- at my prospects, my means of getting somewhere. (Vehicle after vehicle broke down, just after I had broken down in health).Sickness plagued our wagon - and made a feisty, capable woman like me feel like a marshmallow crossed with an old woman. (Mono is something young people battle with more vigor that I could!) As we crossed new frontiers, the distances between wagons grew larger, and words of encouragement grew farther in between. (You can be around Christians but feel very alone sometimes. The Church is a terrible place to waste...away). It's often lonely when you're journeying onward...and onward...and you still can't "see" your destination ahead.
I had a check up at the cardiologist yesterday. (Long story short, mono brought out some previous problems I had with my heart twenty years ago). My heart is in fairly good shape, but there's a couple tiny problems. But his overall assessment of my heart was made in comparing my heart to what people looked like at the Gym. "Some people's hearts are muscular and toned- yours is a bit flabby looking" the doctor told me.
As long as it's beating, I thought rather dryly. This was the same doctor who several months ago had told me to hold off on all exercise. Now I'm supposed to have a muscular, vigorous heart that looks like it wants to scale mountains?! A Mountain Climber's Heart?
I sense a new calling, now. From pioneer to mountain climber- it's all in a day's journey ...onward.
What I remember most of all, about Pioneer Girls, was the theme song we sang every week. I'm not sure they sing this anymore- maybe it's too hokey and old fashioned for today's standards. But I haven't ever forgotten the song- or the message.
"Pioneers across the prairie, in the days of wagon trains,
Pressing On to New Horizons, in our hands, God's Precious Word...." (sung with a solemn, purposeful look on the face)
Somewhere in these last couple years, and specifically these last months, I have adopted into my vocabulary the phrase "onward!". I never noticed how often I said it or thought it or encouraged others with it until I began to read back my writing, my e-mails to others, my messages. If I didn't specifically say the word, I was certainly always thinking it as I encouraged people, as I encouraged myself- on those dark days- in the Lord.
I am a TRUE pioneer girl, and Mrs. Jonas would be proud of me. I have pressed onward when I would have liked to quit. I don't say this proudly or arrogantly- but hear me now, I do say this confidently. You have to KNOW what you are made of- the stock from which you've come. You've got to know that you're the type that will press onward, that you are of the "violent" group who hear the good news of the Kingdom's message, and "seize it".
"And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent take it by force." NKJV Matt 11:12
Better said, and explained, is the Amplified version:
12And from the days of John the Baptist until the present time, the kingdom of heaven has endured violent assault, and violent men seize it by force [as a precious prize--a [a]share in the heavenly kingdom is sought with most ardent zeal and intense exertion].
If you're "pressing on to new horizons" you are most certainly seeking with ardent zeal and intense exertion. And it should feel like you are. Flabby purpose and half-hearted goals are not the earmarks of a pioneer of Christ.
This past year felt like a cross country wagon train expedition. Indians came out of hiding and shot arrows at me- at my prospects, my means of getting somewhere. (Vehicle after vehicle broke down, just after I had broken down in health).Sickness plagued our wagon - and made a feisty, capable woman like me feel like a marshmallow crossed with an old woman. (Mono is something young people battle with more vigor that I could!) As we crossed new frontiers, the distances between wagons grew larger, and words of encouragement grew farther in between. (You can be around Christians but feel very alone sometimes. The Church is a terrible place to waste...away). It's often lonely when you're journeying onward...and onward...and you still can't "see" your destination ahead.
I had a check up at the cardiologist yesterday. (Long story short, mono brought out some previous problems I had with my heart twenty years ago). My heart is in fairly good shape, but there's a couple tiny problems. But his overall assessment of my heart was made in comparing my heart to what people looked like at the Gym. "Some people's hearts are muscular and toned- yours is a bit flabby looking" the doctor told me.
As long as it's beating, I thought rather dryly. This was the same doctor who several months ago had told me to hold off on all exercise. Now I'm supposed to have a muscular, vigorous heart that looks like it wants to scale mountains?! A Mountain Climber's Heart?
I sense a new calling, now. From pioneer to mountain climber- it's all in a day's journey ...onward.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
The Queen of Anonymity No More
I changed my mind about having privacy. I used to be the Queen of Anonymity. But I've decided that once you start blogging, once you start sharing with people your dream of being not just a writer but an author, your calling to proclaim "Behold your God!" from a mountaintop perspective (that was scary to climb)- why think I can still have my cautious, bubble of privacy and artificial peace? I can't- and maybe I really don't want that anymore.
I'm not advocating wild rides down the highway where I shout out my name to the world. But honestly- can I really stay small and cloistered in an anonymity? Can I ignore the admonishment of Isaiah 54 -in the name of false humility and a self-impoverished spirit ?
2 “ Enlarge the place of your tent,
And let them stretch out the curtains of your dwellings;
Do not spare; Lengthen your cords, And strengthen your stakes.
3 For you shall expand to the right and to the left,
And your descendants will inherit the nations,
And make the desolate cities inhabited.
Expansion and desolate cities getting inhabited are not the earmarks of anonymity!
Wikipedia tells us:
Anonymity is derived from the Greek word ανωνυμία, meaning 'without a name' or 'name-less'. In colloquial use, the term typically refers to a person, and often means that the personal identity, or personally identifiable information of that person is not known.
I feel a song coming on....
"FROM THE HIGHEST OF HEIGHTS
To the depths of the sea
Creation’s revealing Your majesty
From the colours of fall
To the fragrance of spring
Every creature unique
In the song that it sings
All exclaiming
Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky
And You know them by name
You are amazing, God
All powerful, untamable
Awestruck, we fall to our knees
As we humbly proclaim
You are amazing, God" (I love this song!)
Now what in the world has brought this all on, you ask? I stopped in at the library today, heart trembling in anticipation of a NEW BOOK to read! Honestly, give me a new book that will change my life- instead of chocolate- any day!
Let me explain my book "anointing" to you. I have this "thing" about "seeing" the book God wants me to read, as I'm perusing the shelves of a library or thrift shop or book store. I can TELL when a book is meant for me. Maybe God knows how I learn best- and that's by reading, studying, delving into someone else's journey and lessons learned. He sees to it that I am well fed!
Today, with book in hand, I left the library feeling like I had been given a ticket to advancement. I always "advance" when I read- by that I mean, I take a step further, I decide not to give up the fight, I get encouraged to go another round. I honestly believe demons tremble when Lauren Caldwell gets a inspirational book of truth in her hands, because they know the book WILL affect me significantly. (Now you know why I want to be a writer who can inspire others to not quit in this life's battle we are in!)
I've been writing about having a dream, and about self-development (I always think of the library catalog categories as to what my writing would fall under). This book- Knit Together: Discover God's Pattern for Your Life- is the first non-fiction book Debbie Macomber has written, after having written over 150 novels, and selling over sixty million books! Talk about learning a secret from her about having a dream and self-development!!
I have to be honest- I am restraining myself from gulping down this book in one sitting, because I don't want it to end. Just reading the Foreword had me savoring the sense of what's to come- an impact will be made on my life, on my thinking, on my self-perspective. Let me share a tidbit from the Foreword by Liz Curtis Higgs;
"Each real-life story Debbie shares is designed to turn your secret dreams into spoken dreams and your spoken dreams into reality."
Is that good or what? That's enough for me to meditate on just for the entire day. In fact, I can't go racing on with my reading, because if I miss even just this one simple truth, I might miss getting on the train to my destination.
Think about this: your secret dreams have to first be birthed in your soul, and you hold them close to your heart. But then they have to get spoken. You need to tell someone about them. Then you get really crazy and start telling the world (it's easy to do with a blog!). Your dreams won't be so secret and private anymore. These spoken dreams will then be on their way to reality- and maybe due to the fact that others will come along side and be part of the dream coming to fruition.
It all starts with coming out of your tiny tent you live in- a humble, self-effacing tent. I know because I lived in that kind of a tent for so long, and thought I was doing God a favor by staying small and quiet. (My husband thinks I would be doing him a favor by staying quiet!) But he's resigned himself to the fact that Lauren has come out of her tent and is reporting for duty,and in that sense, I am only doing what expansion and dream fulfillment require of us.
I'm just coming out of the shadows of obscurity and privacy- for the sake of a dream.
I'm not advocating wild rides down the highway where I shout out my name to the world. But honestly- can I really stay small and cloistered in an anonymity? Can I ignore the admonishment of Isaiah 54 -in the name of false humility and a self-impoverished spirit ?
2 “ Enlarge the place of your tent,
And let them stretch out the curtains of your dwellings;
Do not spare; Lengthen your cords, And strengthen your stakes.
3 For you shall expand to the right and to the left,
And your descendants will inherit the nations,
And make the desolate cities inhabited.
Expansion and desolate cities getting inhabited are not the earmarks of anonymity!
Wikipedia tells us:
Anonymity is derived from the Greek word ανωνυμία, meaning 'without a name' or 'name-less'. In colloquial use, the term typically refers to a person, and often means that the personal identity, or personally identifiable information of that person is not known.
More strictly, and in reference to an arbitrary element (e.g. a human, an object, a computer), .... "anonymity" of that element refers to the property of that element of not being identifiable within this set. If it is not identifiable, then the element is said to be "anonymous".
So how can I shout truth from the mountains, write books for people to read and be encouraged by- if I want to stay anonymous? My life's calling and the results of God's dream birthed in my life should be noticeable, and cause positive rippling effects in this world. It should be identifiable because our God is, Himself, quite amazing and noticeable!
I feel a song coming on....
"FROM THE HIGHEST OF HEIGHTS
To the depths of the sea
Creation’s revealing Your majesty
From the colours of fall
To the fragrance of spring
Every creature unique
In the song that it sings
All exclaiming
Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky
And You know them by name
You are amazing, God
All powerful, untamable
Awestruck, we fall to our knees
As we humbly proclaim
You are amazing, God" (I love this song!)
Now what in the world has brought this all on, you ask? I stopped in at the library today, heart trembling in anticipation of a NEW BOOK to read! Honestly, give me a new book that will change my life- instead of chocolate- any day!
Let me explain my book "anointing" to you. I have this "thing" about "seeing" the book God wants me to read, as I'm perusing the shelves of a library or thrift shop or book store. I can TELL when a book is meant for me. Maybe God knows how I learn best- and that's by reading, studying, delving into someone else's journey and lessons learned. He sees to it that I am well fed!
Today, with book in hand, I left the library feeling like I had been given a ticket to advancement. I always "advance" when I read- by that I mean, I take a step further, I decide not to give up the fight, I get encouraged to go another round. I honestly believe demons tremble when Lauren Caldwell gets a inspirational book of truth in her hands, because they know the book WILL affect me significantly. (Now you know why I want to be a writer who can inspire others to not quit in this life's battle we are in!)
I've been writing about having a dream, and about self-development (I always think of the library catalog categories as to what my writing would fall under). This book- Knit Together: Discover God's Pattern for Your Life- is the first non-fiction book Debbie Macomber has written, after having written over 150 novels, and selling over sixty million books! Talk about learning a secret from her about having a dream and self-development!!
I have to be honest- I am restraining myself from gulping down this book in one sitting, because I don't want it to end. Just reading the Foreword had me savoring the sense of what's to come- an impact will be made on my life, on my thinking, on my self-perspective. Let me share a tidbit from the Foreword by Liz Curtis Higgs;
"Each real-life story Debbie shares is designed to turn your secret dreams into spoken dreams and your spoken dreams into reality."
Is that good or what? That's enough for me to meditate on just for the entire day. In fact, I can't go racing on with my reading, because if I miss even just this one simple truth, I might miss getting on the train to my destination.
Think about this: your secret dreams have to first be birthed in your soul, and you hold them close to your heart. But then they have to get spoken. You need to tell someone about them. Then you get really crazy and start telling the world (it's easy to do with a blog!). Your dreams won't be so secret and private anymore. These spoken dreams will then be on their way to reality- and maybe due to the fact that others will come along side and be part of the dream coming to fruition.
It all starts with coming out of your tiny tent you live in- a humble, self-effacing tent. I know because I lived in that kind of a tent for so long, and thought I was doing God a favor by staying small and quiet. (My husband thinks I would be doing him a favor by staying quiet!) But he's resigned himself to the fact that Lauren has come out of her tent and is reporting for duty,and in that sense, I am only doing what expansion and dream fulfillment require of us.
I'm just coming out of the shadows of obscurity and privacy- for the sake of a dream.
Monday, August 20, 2007
I've Changed My Mind
I've changed my mind, literally. No, I don't mean I'm going back and forth between decisions (though I have done that!). I mean- I have changed my mindset- my point of view. I say this by faith, I say this by expectation of God's help, and I say this with a drop of evidence that I see. But nevertheless, I am changing everything about me. I've decided to appropriate this newness of being that we can have when we are walking with Christ.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Christ in me, the hope of glory! Christ IN me means I do have hope that I CAN change. And not just change a couple things about me, but ALL things. I don't mean a personality change- a change in temperament and in my history- but I do mean a change in how I see me, and how I know God sees me, and therefore how I act, and in what direction I press onward.
It started with a dream I had the other night. In my dream, I was in my car, crossing a bridge up high in the mountains. I felt afraid of the heights and I saw the steep drop all around me. I was going forward, though- even though I was afraid. And as I drove forward, I felt the love of God encompass me, hem me in, hover over me. Such a juxtaposition of feelings. On the one hand, I felt afraid of the heights, and aware of the openness all around me, but on the other hand, I felt protected, and almost as if there were the weight of wings spread over me. I was feeling fear, but I was drawn to the love I felt- so I could go forward. And I did.
I've decided I don't have to look around at myself all the time, stick in the spiritual thermometer to see how I'm doing, taking my spiritual pulse and continually assess my spiritual health, all the while murmuring sadly in a low voice "not good, not good at all."
I can't make it with that kind of suffocating introspection over every mistake I make, but nor can I make it by being a foolish daredevil and just set out over the heights and walk across a rope, overly confident in my own abilities. But I can be confident in His abilities!
"He makes my feet like hinds' [feet], And sets me on my high places. (NASB) 2 Samuel 22:34 tells us.
( He makes my feet like those of a deer and gives me sure footing on high places.)
HE says I've got feet like a deer, able to go up into scary high places and not fall.He says I can have the mind of Christ. HE says He has not given me a "spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind"- and I've decided to say "Thank you" and appropriate what HE says.
I changed my mind about how I feel about myself- which is the fact that some days I like me, and some days I'd like to trade myself in for a newer, improved model. And then I realize that God has already traded me in- redeemed my life, given me Christ "in me" as my hope of glory.
"From glory to glory He's changing me..." the song goes.
And it all begins with what I think about that- do I believe it? And I've decided that I do. I've decided to take His perspective on me as truth.
So, I've changed my mind.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Christ in me, the hope of glory! Christ IN me means I do have hope that I CAN change. And not just change a couple things about me, but ALL things. I don't mean a personality change- a change in temperament and in my history- but I do mean a change in how I see me, and how I know God sees me, and therefore how I act, and in what direction I press onward.
It started with a dream I had the other night. In my dream, I was in my car, crossing a bridge up high in the mountains. I felt afraid of the heights and I saw the steep drop all around me. I was going forward, though- even though I was afraid. And as I drove forward, I felt the love of God encompass me, hem me in, hover over me. Such a juxtaposition of feelings. On the one hand, I felt afraid of the heights, and aware of the openness all around me, but on the other hand, I felt protected, and almost as if there were the weight of wings spread over me. I was feeling fear, but I was drawn to the love I felt- so I could go forward. And I did.
I've decided I don't have to look around at myself all the time, stick in the spiritual thermometer to see how I'm doing, taking my spiritual pulse and continually assess my spiritual health, all the while murmuring sadly in a low voice "not good, not good at all."
I can't make it with that kind of suffocating introspection over every mistake I make, but nor can I make it by being a foolish daredevil and just set out over the heights and walk across a rope, overly confident in my own abilities. But I can be confident in His abilities!
"He makes my feet like hinds' [feet], And sets me on my high places. (NASB) 2 Samuel 22:34 tells us.
( He makes my feet like those of a deer and gives me sure footing on high places.)
HE says I've got feet like a deer, able to go up into scary high places and not fall.He says I can have the mind of Christ. HE says He has not given me a "spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind"- and I've decided to say "Thank you" and appropriate what HE says.
I changed my mind about how I feel about myself- which is the fact that some days I like me, and some days I'd like to trade myself in for a newer, improved model. And then I realize that God has already traded me in- redeemed my life, given me Christ "in me" as my hope of glory.
"From glory to glory He's changing me..." the song goes.
And it all begins with what I think about that- do I believe it? And I've decided that I do. I've decided to take His perspective on me as truth.
So, I've changed my mind.
Friday, August 17, 2007
What is a Dream Part 3
The Struggle Within
Have I ever told you that when I gave birth to my first child, our son, that I thought I was going to die? Seriously. (Now I have talked with my son about this whole scene, so don't worry that he will be traumatized for life thinking that he almost killed his mother!)
I had a difficult pregnancy (and it only got worse with pregnancy #2, but that's another story). I was so sick and weak, barely gained any weight, and at approx. my 36th week, my water broke.
Bill nervously rushed me to the hospital on a dark night, up in the mountain top town of Bethlehem New Hampshire. But then nothing happened. No labor. Nothing. By the next day, they had to induce labor because of the high risk, and the doctor thought it would take a while for me to respond to the pitocin. Ha! Bill had gone down to the cafeteria for a bite to eat, my doctor had left the hospital for his office down the street, and I was left alone in the room with a nurse who was bored. But she wasn't bored for long.
A freight train suddenly, out of nowhere, rushed through my body. I began to writhe in pain and scream. Nurses rushed in. Bill returned from the cafeteria and saw me and was frozen at the sight. They called for the doctor. They were not prepared for what happened- my body over-reacted to the small amount of pitocin in my system- and it was too late to give me an epidural for the pain. I thrashed around on the bed, screaming. I thought I was dying, and that I had to get this " freight train" out of my body!
I transitioned so quickly that they rushed me into the delivery room, and called in the pediatrician (because my baby was going to be premature and underweight). This is where I kicked the doctor in the face (I have a legitimate excuse- I was deranged with pain!). I literally forgot I was about to give birth. I just thought I was in a battle of life or death.
Several weeks later, after Alex was born at 4 lbs.14ozs , had stayed in the hospital close to a week, and was released in good health, I was at a post-natal exercise class. (What was I thinking?! I had had enough exercise in the delivery room to last me 400 years!!) I ran into a woman who compared notes with me, and realized she was in the birthing ward at the same time I was. When I explained what time I was in labor and gave birth (omitting the fact that I was shrieking the whole time) she put two and two together and said, "Oh, you were the one screaming! If that had been my first baby, you would have scared the *#&! out of me! (Sorry, but those were her exact words.)
This all leads me to my point: many forget that you have to give birth to your dream. Often we find ourselves shocked at the amount of pain it takes to bring our dreams to the point of delivery. One of the final chapters in Christine Caine's book A Life Unleashed: Giving Birth to Your Dreams has this as a chapter heading -"No Pain, No Gain". That pretty much sums it up. She explains that this stage of transitioning toward the pushing out of your dream contains intense testing.
"It's usually during this intense time of pain that we want to walk away and give up on our dreams," Caine writes.
I would have walked away from pushing out the baby if the pain hadn't been so extreme. But the answer of relief was only ONE way, sister- and that's pushing the baby out! But with dreams, we do have the option of stopping in mid point, failing to progress in labor, or closing up shop on our dream and walking away. And you think the pain will then go away?! It doesn't. It never goes away when you have walked away from the dream God has placed in your heart.
I have shared my birthing story in somewhat vivid detail to help you be sober minded about the reality of giving birth to your dreams. Jesus thought this was a good idea- letting people know the tough times ahead but also the comforting peace He provides.
"These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." JOHN 16:33
I feel like ole Aunt Agnes of the Mountain Top Revival Church when I say this: It's almost a sin to hide disturbing truth, and not prepare people for the reality of the battle. This lack of disclosure of truth is a stumbling block. When people are finally faced with the reality of the battle, they are shocked at the pain, and surprised by the arduous nature of the task. Many lose heart, abandon ship, and walk away from their dreams- or worse, the Faith.
Matthew 18:7 [Jesus said,] "Woe to the world because of stumbling blocks! Occasions for stumbling are bound to come, but woe to the one by whom the stumbling block comes!"
Romans 14:13 Let us therefore no longer pass judgment on one another, but resolve instead never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of another.
I think one reason there is SO MUCH DESPAIR AND DEPRESSION in the Church is that we have believers going through great trials, arduous journeys, cataclysmic birthing scenes, and NO ONE prepared them for the "ugly reality" of it. And they're stumbling into despair because of this.
We smile and share our triumphs, but we do not want people to know we spent the night weeping in our closet, or pacing empty moonlit streets because we could not sleep with the beast of anxiety and worry hovering over us. We don't want people to know we are scared out of our mind as we face financial constraints and a possible abortion of our dream if we can't make the next round of payments. Somehow we think these sad scenes of burdened, stressed out saints in agony are signs that we are NOT on our way to the fulfillment of our dreams.
That couldn't be farther from the truth. The struggle, the lion's den, the fiery furnace are places where dreams are pushed out. Hear this: it gets hotter and harder just as liberation and fulfillment come!
"Anytime God is about to bless you and answer your prayer, expect a struggle within..." TD Jakes writes.
So here's the good news and the bad news. Giving birth to a dream is simply the hardest, messiest, most agonizing thing you can go through - but it's WORTH IT. It IS a struggle. Ask Bruce Wilkinson, author of The Dream Giver. Ask anyone who has travailed and triumphed in the end.
Now, after all this stark reality, you've still got a dream? Good. I mean that- it really is a GOOD thing. Remember that. Because there will be days when you feel like you are cursed with having this dream, days when you feel like the weight of this dream will kill you, and days when you soar higher and higher on wings of God's grace and His enduring hope -
because you have a dream.
Have I ever told you that when I gave birth to my first child, our son, that I thought I was going to die? Seriously. (Now I have talked with my son about this whole scene, so don't worry that he will be traumatized for life thinking that he almost killed his mother!)
I had a difficult pregnancy (and it only got worse with pregnancy #2, but that's another story). I was so sick and weak, barely gained any weight, and at approx. my 36th week, my water broke.
Bill nervously rushed me to the hospital on a dark night, up in the mountain top town of Bethlehem New Hampshire. But then nothing happened. No labor. Nothing. By the next day, they had to induce labor because of the high risk, and the doctor thought it would take a while for me to respond to the pitocin. Ha! Bill had gone down to the cafeteria for a bite to eat, my doctor had left the hospital for his office down the street, and I was left alone in the room with a nurse who was bored. But she wasn't bored for long.
A freight train suddenly, out of nowhere, rushed through my body. I began to writhe in pain and scream. Nurses rushed in. Bill returned from the cafeteria and saw me and was frozen at the sight. They called for the doctor. They were not prepared for what happened- my body over-reacted to the small amount of pitocin in my system- and it was too late to give me an epidural for the pain. I thrashed around on the bed, screaming. I thought I was dying, and that I had to get this " freight train" out of my body!
I transitioned so quickly that they rushed me into the delivery room, and called in the pediatrician (because my baby was going to be premature and underweight). This is where I kicked the doctor in the face (I have a legitimate excuse- I was deranged with pain!). I literally forgot I was about to give birth. I just thought I was in a battle of life or death.
Several weeks later, after Alex was born at 4 lbs.14ozs , had stayed in the hospital close to a week, and was released in good health, I was at a post-natal exercise class. (What was I thinking?! I had had enough exercise in the delivery room to last me 400 years!!) I ran into a woman who compared notes with me, and realized she was in the birthing ward at the same time I was. When I explained what time I was in labor and gave birth (omitting the fact that I was shrieking the whole time) she put two and two together and said, "Oh, you were the one screaming! If that had been my first baby, you would have scared the *#&! out of me! (Sorry, but those were her exact words.)
This all leads me to my point: many forget that you have to give birth to your dream. Often we find ourselves shocked at the amount of pain it takes to bring our dreams to the point of delivery. One of the final chapters in Christine Caine's book A Life Unleashed: Giving Birth to Your Dreams has this as a chapter heading -"No Pain, No Gain". That pretty much sums it up. She explains that this stage of transitioning toward the pushing out of your dream contains intense testing.
"It's usually during this intense time of pain that we want to walk away and give up on our dreams," Caine writes.
I would have walked away from pushing out the baby if the pain hadn't been so extreme. But the answer of relief was only ONE way, sister- and that's pushing the baby out! But with dreams, we do have the option of stopping in mid point, failing to progress in labor, or closing up shop on our dream and walking away. And you think the pain will then go away?! It doesn't. It never goes away when you have walked away from the dream God has placed in your heart.
I have shared my birthing story in somewhat vivid detail to help you be sober minded about the reality of giving birth to your dreams. Jesus thought this was a good idea- letting people know the tough times ahead but also the comforting peace He provides.
"These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." JOHN 16:33
I feel like ole Aunt Agnes of the Mountain Top Revival Church when I say this: It's almost a sin to hide disturbing truth, and not prepare people for the reality of the battle. This lack of disclosure of truth is a stumbling block. When people are finally faced with the reality of the battle, they are shocked at the pain, and surprised by the arduous nature of the task. Many lose heart, abandon ship, and walk away from their dreams- or worse, the Faith.
Matthew 18:7 [Jesus said,] "Woe to the world because of stumbling blocks! Occasions for stumbling are bound to come, but woe to the one by whom the stumbling block comes!"
Romans 14:13 Let us therefore no longer pass judgment on one another, but resolve instead never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of another.
I think one reason there is SO MUCH DESPAIR AND DEPRESSION in the Church is that we have believers going through great trials, arduous journeys, cataclysmic birthing scenes, and NO ONE prepared them for the "ugly reality" of it. And they're stumbling into despair because of this.
We smile and share our triumphs, but we do not want people to know we spent the night weeping in our closet, or pacing empty moonlit streets because we could not sleep with the beast of anxiety and worry hovering over us. We don't want people to know we are scared out of our mind as we face financial constraints and a possible abortion of our dream if we can't make the next round of payments. Somehow we think these sad scenes of burdened, stressed out saints in agony are signs that we are NOT on our way to the fulfillment of our dreams.
That couldn't be farther from the truth. The struggle, the lion's den, the fiery furnace are places where dreams are pushed out. Hear this: it gets hotter and harder just as liberation and fulfillment come!
"Anytime God is about to bless you and answer your prayer, expect a struggle within..." TD Jakes writes.
So here's the good news and the bad news. Giving birth to a dream is simply the hardest, messiest, most agonizing thing you can go through - but it's WORTH IT. It IS a struggle. Ask Bruce Wilkinson, author of The Dream Giver. Ask anyone who has travailed and triumphed in the end.
Now, after all this stark reality, you've still got a dream? Good. I mean that- it really is a GOOD thing. Remember that. Because there will be days when you feel like you are cursed with having this dream, days when you feel like the weight of this dream will kill you, and days when you soar higher and higher on wings of God's grace and His enduring hope -
because you have a dream.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
What is a Dream?!- Part 2
In Expectation of a Harvest
Having a Dream involves two components: the dream itself and the results of having a dream. The Dream itself is your gift to the world, sometimes literally. Think of Joseph in the Old Testament- the fulfillment of his dream would involve his brothers "bowing" to him in honor and in need of the surplus grain that he ruled over, and was even responsible for its existence. If Joseph hadn't interpreted the dream, and been put in the position to be second in command over the land and over the process of reaping and storing the grain- there would have been no surplus to share with the world, and especially, to share with his own family. It all started with a dream- his- and with the interpretation of a dream, later.
The dream itself should be big enough that it touches the world in some way (ie. running an orphanage, speaking hope to the captives, running a business that will employ thousands). The second part of having a dream is the fuel it injects into your life, the wind beneath your wings (sing it, Bette Midler!), the breeze that lifts your sails and inspires you to get up every day and face mountains when you have to. And with guts (I could say " courageously" but that sounds more lofty than the actual guts you need)- and with guts, say "Be gone" to those mountains. Then proceed doing the work of clean up- because when mountains crumble before you there's usually a little clean up to do!
Years ago, back in some dark days of my life when having a dream was pretty much all I had, circumstances were so tight, literally, and resources so limited that I needed more than a dream- I needed provision for the day in order to maintain the dream for tomorrow. I remember being challenged by one of the many inspirational books I was reading at that time.
( I read a lot- it is my faith fuel! I read a lot of Christian self-help books, books written by Life Coaches and by leaders who have persevered through tough times). I had little income coming in during that time, my husband was not pastoring anymore and was trying to run a small remodeling business, and we were not a pretty sight, emotionally. Our hopes were prime ingredients for a good wine: they were crushed!
But as I read this one book, I felt challenged to write down what I would do with the harvest when my dreams were coming true. I felt led to take a figure of a million dollars a year, and write down what I would do with it. I first wrote "tithe ten percent" then increased it to 20%. That's easy. Then I wrote "buy a home to live in, and spread out in" because we were living in a tiny cottage with two children. Then I paused. What else? I wrote "Fund an orphanage" because I knew someone who wanted to run an orphanage someday. But that's as far as I got. I had so much harvest- in my dream- but no plans to utilize it, disperse it, grow it, and benefit from it.
As long as we can't think of what to do with a big harvest, that would be honoring to God, then we have no reason to pursue a harvest. And if we have no reason for a big harvest, we have no motivation to put our hand to the plow and get started on the process of cultivating, sowing, watering, and then reaping a harvest. What for? We have no big barn prepared to properly store the harvest and from which we can share it, disperse it, maintain it. We have no reason to have a dream if there is no harvest in mind. There would be no gift to the world- without a dream- and there would be no fuel for living an inspired life- a life God breathes into.
The passage of 1 Cor. 9: 3-14 talks about reaping from the spiritual task of sowing- and how its okay to reap materially in doing a "spiritual" task such as preaching the word. When you have a dream, your dream is a gift to the world- we've established that. But many do not think they can partake of the by-product of having a dream: the enthusiasm, the joy it gives, the inspiration and motivation that having a dream provides for your life.
"Assuredly it is written for our sakes, because the plowman ought to plow in hope, and the thresher ought to thresh in expectation of partaking of the harvest." 2 Cor 9:10 Ampl
When you're preparing to bring your dream to the world- even if your dream has died several times, God has resurrected it and it's now time to give birth to it- you will partake of the joy of seeing it realized. And if your dream is still in the transition stage of coming about, then even more so- be expectant of the harvest! Walk about with a smile of amazement on your face because you "see" it ahead. Let people ask you, "What's going on with you?"
Tell them, "I'm expecting a harvest- because I have a dream."
Having a Dream involves two components: the dream itself and the results of having a dream. The Dream itself is your gift to the world, sometimes literally. Think of Joseph in the Old Testament- the fulfillment of his dream would involve his brothers "bowing" to him in honor and in need of the surplus grain that he ruled over, and was even responsible for its existence. If Joseph hadn't interpreted the dream, and been put in the position to be second in command over the land and over the process of reaping and storing the grain- there would have been no surplus to share with the world, and especially, to share with his own family. It all started with a dream- his- and with the interpretation of a dream, later.
The dream itself should be big enough that it touches the world in some way (ie. running an orphanage, speaking hope to the captives, running a business that will employ thousands). The second part of having a dream is the fuel it injects into your life, the wind beneath your wings (sing it, Bette Midler!), the breeze that lifts your sails and inspires you to get up every day and face mountains when you have to. And with guts (I could say " courageously" but that sounds more lofty than the actual guts you need)- and with guts, say "Be gone" to those mountains. Then proceed doing the work of clean up- because when mountains crumble before you there's usually a little clean up to do!
Years ago, back in some dark days of my life when having a dream was pretty much all I had, circumstances were so tight, literally, and resources so limited that I needed more than a dream- I needed provision for the day in order to maintain the dream for tomorrow. I remember being challenged by one of the many inspirational books I was reading at that time.
( I read a lot- it is my faith fuel! I read a lot of Christian self-help books, books written by Life Coaches and by leaders who have persevered through tough times). I had little income coming in during that time, my husband was not pastoring anymore and was trying to run a small remodeling business, and we were not a pretty sight, emotionally. Our hopes were prime ingredients for a good wine: they were crushed!
But as I read this one book, I felt challenged to write down what I would do with the harvest when my dreams were coming true. I felt led to take a figure of a million dollars a year, and write down what I would do with it. I first wrote "tithe ten percent" then increased it to 20%. That's easy. Then I wrote "buy a home to live in, and spread out in" because we were living in a tiny cottage with two children. Then I paused. What else? I wrote "Fund an orphanage" because I knew someone who wanted to run an orphanage someday. But that's as far as I got. I had so much harvest- in my dream- but no plans to utilize it, disperse it, grow it, and benefit from it.
As long as we can't think of what to do with a big harvest, that would be honoring to God, then we have no reason to pursue a harvest. And if we have no reason for a big harvest, we have no motivation to put our hand to the plow and get started on the process of cultivating, sowing, watering, and then reaping a harvest. What for? We have no big barn prepared to properly store the harvest and from which we can share it, disperse it, maintain it. We have no reason to have a dream if there is no harvest in mind. There would be no gift to the world- without a dream- and there would be no fuel for living an inspired life- a life God breathes into.
The passage of 1 Cor. 9: 3-14 talks about reaping from the spiritual task of sowing- and how its okay to reap materially in doing a "spiritual" task such as preaching the word. When you have a dream, your dream is a gift to the world- we've established that. But many do not think they can partake of the by-product of having a dream: the enthusiasm, the joy it gives, the inspiration and motivation that having a dream provides for your life.
"Assuredly it is written for our sakes, because the plowman ought to plow in hope, and the thresher ought to thresh in expectation of partaking of the harvest." 2 Cor 9:10 Ampl
When you're preparing to bring your dream to the world- even if your dream has died several times, God has resurrected it and it's now time to give birth to it- you will partake of the joy of seeing it realized. And if your dream is still in the transition stage of coming about, then even more so- be expectant of the harvest! Walk about with a smile of amazement on your face because you "see" it ahead. Let people ask you, "What's going on with you?"
Tell them, "I'm expecting a harvest- because I have a dream."
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
What's a Dream?!
Ladies, and any gentlemen reading this blog-(and if there are men, I apologize for the undergarments reference from the last post!) I have to interrupt this message for an emergency announcement- (hear the beep, beep, beep in the background)-
It has come to my attention that several respondents, already, on the poll listed below, do not have- and do not know what a dream is!! And I believe there are more people out there without a dream- and I've got to address this.
I could not be where I am today (and where exactly am I, Lord?!) were it not for holding onto a dream for my life. My first dream, originating back in sixth grade, was to be a writer. I write, therefore I am! But more than that, it was the beginning of having something to share with the world.
"Something beautiful, something good,
of my confusion, He understood
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife
But He made something...beautiful ...of my life" ......music fades out
He really has done that. But it started with having a dream of being someone who could share something good with the world. I've gone on to add in other dreams, dreams I share with my husband, Bill, and dreams I've had for our family, and dreams I've had for places I'd like to visit (living in Spain and traveling through Europe back in college, was a dream my Dad had for me, and he birthed that dream into my heart and wouldn't let me walk away from it- when I was about to.) Mil gracias, papa.
It is vital that we have a dream, and maybe more than one! God's people are characterized by wild, over-the-top dreams that only a wild, over-the-top God could help us fulfill! That's why this passage , from Psalm 126, is one of my favorite dream-boosters:
1 When the LORD brought back the captives to Zion,
we were like men who dreamed.
It has come to my attention that several respondents, already, on the poll listed below, do not have- and do not know what a dream is!! And I believe there are more people out there without a dream- and I've got to address this.
I could not be where I am today (and where exactly am I, Lord?!) were it not for holding onto a dream for my life. My first dream, originating back in sixth grade, was to be a writer. I write, therefore I am! But more than that, it was the beginning of having something to share with the world.
"Something beautiful, something good,
of my confusion, He understood
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife
But He made something...beautiful ...of my life" ......music fades out
He really has done that. But it started with having a dream of being someone who could share something good with the world. I've gone on to add in other dreams, dreams I share with my husband, Bill, and dreams I've had for our family, and dreams I've had for places I'd like to visit (living in Spain and traveling through Europe back in college, was a dream my Dad had for me, and he birthed that dream into my heart and wouldn't let me walk away from it- when I was about to.) Mil gracias, papa.
It is vital that we have a dream, and maybe more than one! God's people are characterized by wild, over-the-top dreams that only a wild, over-the-top God could help us fulfill! That's why this passage , from Psalm 126, is one of my favorite dream-boosters:
1 When the LORD brought back the captives to Zion,
we were like men who dreamed.
2 Our mouths were filled with laughter,
our tongues with songs of joy.
Then it was said among the nations,
"The LORD has done great things for them."
3 The LORD has done great things for us,
and we are filled with joy.
When people see God do an amazing work in your life, when He fulfills a dream, when He turns around your captivity, people will notice! And they will attribute this amazing work to God-
no one will be able to refute that a great God did a great work in making a great dream come true. And notice the lovely by-product of this miracle- you will be filled with joy. You will sigh in satisfaction. You will look heavenward but will also be busy with the joy of your heart for as long as you're here on earth....
Monday, August 13, 2007
Will Wonders Never Cease?!
Will wonders never cease! The most amazing things have happened. Now to some, they might not seem miraculous- but to me, well, they're amazing. At our daughter's 13th birthday party, my parents and siblings came over for a cook out. Little tidbits of information got relayed to me in a most unassuming manner- but they made my eyes open wide with wonder. Someone is using their teaching gift at a church - and they haven't done that in a very long time. Another wondrous account I heard was someone throwing away something old they had worn for a long time- after receiving a gift from someone who never goes out shopping for someone else. Her eyes twinkled as she relayed it to me. (Hint, hint: When is the last time you bought new underwear?!) These may not be big wonders to you, but I SAW them for what they were: He is changing us.
Anytime someone changes a habit, or does something they've never done before, you should marvel. Making a change is a miraculous thing. I am trying to break out of old mental habits, and trying to give birth to a new self-perspective: seeing myself the way God sees me. This coming year, the theme for the Women's LIFE workshops I teach at at my home church is
"It's a New You"- and we'll be exploring every aspect of our lives in the light of what Scripture tells us should be "new"- "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come." 2 Cor. 5:17. New things have come- miraculous things, wondrous things.
I got thinking about the word "wonders", and I started humming that song "God of wonders beyond our galaxy...." What are the wonders He is doing in my life? Do I have eyes to see them?
"Wonders" in Scripture appear in many places. One word is pala (Judges 13:19- "did a wondrous thing")- to perform a miracle, marvel, wonder, or supernatural deed. In Zech 3:8 it's called mophet- a miracle, sign, token, wonder. This word is used 36x in the Old Testament. But what's really interesting, according to the commentary in my Spirit-Filled Life Bible is this: "While mophet contains the idea of something miraculous, in some references it seems to connote an illustration or an example."
In the New Testament, in Acts 15 and the discussion of the Jerusalem Council, miracles and wonders done among the Gentiles convinced the Jewish brethern that God was, indeed, at work in their lives too- and that they were to be included in the Christian family. This word "teras"- wonders- expands further our understanding of this word. It "denotes extraordinary occurrences...unusual manifestations, miraculous incidents portending the future rather than the past, and acts so unusual they cause the observer to marvel or be in awe."
When you observe these wonders, (whether they be the purchase of new undergarments by someone who never does that, or something more miraculous than that!) you should marvel and be in awe....of the God who works mightily in our lives to change us, to cause us to go from stuck in a rut to "born free" (remember that old song?!), from slave-mentality to an understanding that "I am a child of God".
Deut 6:21-23 reminds us of our spiritual ancestors who were brought "out of Egypt with a mighty hand; and the Lord showed signs and wonders before our eyes...Then He brought us out from there, that He might bring us in, to give us the land of which He swore to our fathers"
The Lord shows wonders as a demonstration of His power as He brings us out of bondage. And He brings us out of bad situations, out of bondage, out of a bad mindset- in order to bring us into a good place, a good land. A spacious place where you can stretch out in your God-given gifts and talents and till the earth, sow your seed, and see a harvest. And remember, you shall see the labor of your soul and be....satisfied. Jesus did. (Isaiah 53:11) That alone is a miracle- a wonder- when you see a satisfied saint, who has once gone out weeping- but still bearing their seed for sowing- and then you see them returning, rejoicing, bringing their sheaves with them. ( Psalm 126 :5,6) It's a sign- it's a "picture promise" that God wants you to have in your mind. You- satisifed- filled up with God to overflowing.
Will wonders never cease!!
Anytime someone changes a habit, or does something they've never done before, you should marvel. Making a change is a miraculous thing. I am trying to break out of old mental habits, and trying to give birth to a new self-perspective: seeing myself the way God sees me. This coming year, the theme for the Women's LIFE workshops I teach at at my home church is
"It's a New You"- and we'll be exploring every aspect of our lives in the light of what Scripture tells us should be "new"- "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come." 2 Cor. 5:17. New things have come- miraculous things, wondrous things.
I got thinking about the word "wonders", and I started humming that song "God of wonders beyond our galaxy...." What are the wonders He is doing in my life? Do I have eyes to see them?
"Wonders" in Scripture appear in many places. One word is pala (Judges 13:19- "did a wondrous thing")- to perform a miracle, marvel, wonder, or supernatural deed. In Zech 3:8 it's called mophet- a miracle, sign, token, wonder. This word is used 36x in the Old Testament. But what's really interesting, according to the commentary in my Spirit-Filled Life Bible is this: "While mophet contains the idea of something miraculous, in some references it seems to connote an illustration or an example."
In the New Testament, in Acts 15 and the discussion of the Jerusalem Council, miracles and wonders done among the Gentiles convinced the Jewish brethern that God was, indeed, at work in their lives too- and that they were to be included in the Christian family. This word "teras"- wonders- expands further our understanding of this word. It "denotes extraordinary occurrences...unusual manifestations, miraculous incidents portending the future rather than the past, and acts so unusual they cause the observer to marvel or be in awe."
When you observe these wonders, (whether they be the purchase of new undergarments by someone who never does that, or something more miraculous than that!) you should marvel and be in awe....of the God who works mightily in our lives to change us, to cause us to go from stuck in a rut to "born free" (remember that old song?!), from slave-mentality to an understanding that "I am a child of God".
Deut 6:21-23 reminds us of our spiritual ancestors who were brought "out of Egypt with a mighty hand; and the Lord showed signs and wonders before our eyes...Then He brought us out from there, that He might bring us in, to give us the land of which He swore to our fathers"
The Lord shows wonders as a demonstration of His power as He brings us out of bondage. And He brings us out of bad situations, out of bondage, out of a bad mindset- in order to bring us into a good place, a good land. A spacious place where you can stretch out in your God-given gifts and talents and till the earth, sow your seed, and see a harvest. And remember, you shall see the labor of your soul and be....satisfied. Jesus did. (Isaiah 53:11) That alone is a miracle- a wonder- when you see a satisfied saint, who has once gone out weeping- but still bearing their seed for sowing- and then you see them returning, rejoicing, bringing their sheaves with them. ( Psalm 126 :5,6) It's a sign- it's a "picture promise" that God wants you to have in your mind. You- satisifed- filled up with God to overflowing.
Will wonders never cease!!
Saturday, August 11, 2007
From a distance
Tomorrow I will be -not the mother of a child and a teen- but the mother of two teenagers. My daughter turns 13 tomorrow. This is the sweet girl who still likes to walk with her hand in mine, who'll call me by phone when she's sick and needs me to race up a mountain to get to her, who gives me foot rubs, who likes to bake with me, and who is my fashion consultant. (You should see her roll her eyes when I pick out something too staid and dull! )
These will be wonderful years. (I'm "calling it out", remember?). I don't say this naively- I already have a 17 yr old teenage son who has taught me more about calling upon God for grace than almost anything else has! But it's not because he's wild or bad- he's just an adult-in-process and I'm a mother who is learning the art of loving fiercely and "letting go". I never realized when I gave birth to my children that I would always, always be a mother- yet they would not always be children.Think about that. They grow, mature, and leave the nest someday, walking away as adults practically. We grow, mature, but we will never stop being a mother- even though they need less mothering of the type we did for so many years.
My daughter seems to like trying her wings based at home base. She can't see how she would ever want to leave home. I may always have a close relationship with her, or she may grow more than she thought, and change to need more room, more challenges, more sights to see. I really don't know how our relationship will change.
For now, her hand is in mine a lot, her eyes smiling at me. My teenage son smiles at me, but from across a room or as he is heading out the door. And from a necessary distance, I can see he is doing just fine. I may not always do well with this transition.But we will still transition. We can not stay in the past, nor cling to the memories of what they were: adorable children with impish grins, snuggled close to me. They will always be snuggled close to my heart, but even as I embrace them I will see them, more and more ...from a distance.
"To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven...." Ecclesiastes 3:1
These will be wonderful years. (I'm "calling it out", remember?). I don't say this naively- I already have a 17 yr old teenage son who has taught me more about calling upon God for grace than almost anything else has! But it's not because he's wild or bad- he's just an adult-in-process and I'm a mother who is learning the art of loving fiercely and "letting go". I never realized when I gave birth to my children that I would always, always be a mother- yet they would not always be children.Think about that. They grow, mature, and leave the nest someday, walking away as adults practically. We grow, mature, but we will never stop being a mother- even though they need less mothering of the type we did for so many years.
My daughter seems to like trying her wings based at home base. She can't see how she would ever want to leave home. I may always have a close relationship with her, or she may grow more than she thought, and change to need more room, more challenges, more sights to see. I really don't know how our relationship will change.
For now, her hand is in mine a lot, her eyes smiling at me. My teenage son smiles at me, but from across a room or as he is heading out the door. And from a necessary distance, I can see he is doing just fine. I may not always do well with this transition.But we will still transition. We can not stay in the past, nor cling to the memories of what they were: adorable children with impish grins, snuggled close to me. They will always be snuggled close to my heart, but even as I embrace them I will see them, more and more ...from a distance.
"To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven...." Ecclesiastes 3:1
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Satisfaction
I am back to voyaging with vocabulary. When I was in high school, we had to do so much vocabulary memorization. I am never sorry that I had to do so. It has paid off in my life. The years we were homeschooling our son, I gave him plenty of vocabulary work, and lots of Greek and Latin vocab. to memorize.
This all comes from having grown up in a home where my Dad, having come from Bolivia to the U.S. at the age of 19, learned the English language - and learned it well. And God help his kids if they didn't speak the English language properly! There was never any lazy questions allowed in our home. If you ever asked,"Dad, what does this word mean?" he would always say "Go get the dictionary and look it up." He knew more vocabulary words than the average man, but he wouldn't let us ride on his coat tails. He wanted us to learn the meaning of words. He wanted us to put our efforts into knowing the power of each word we spoke.
Words are powerful. Certain words, clearly understood, turn on light bulbs in our head. Certain words , lately, are really sticking in my head. It's like God is saying "GET THIS!"
The word for today is satisfaction. I love "s" words- they're simply scintillating and smashing!(Some words are just fun to speak, period.)
But this word- satisfaction- seems to get Christians up in arms. It seems like a selfish word or a sinful word. People immediately think of sexual connotation or of selfish endeavors in getting satisfaction. But I love this word- and God does too!
"A man will be satisfied with good by the fruit of his mouth, and the recompense of a man's hands will be rendered to him." Prov.12:14
Wiktionary describes the meaning of satisfaction:
18 Then I realized that it is good and proper for a man to eat and drink, and to find satisfaction in his toilsome labor under the sun during the few days of life God has given him—for this is his lot. 19 Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to accept his lot and be happy in his work—this is a gift of God. 20 He seldom reflects on the days of his life, because God keeps him occupied with gladness of heart. Eccl. 5:18-20
Your heritage and your inheritance is satisfaction. Satisfaction is something you can get- it comes with the sweat of your brow, the work of your hands, the words from your lips. Speak well, speak kindly, and you will be satisfied you did. Write, create, draw or express yourself in an artistic way, and you'll be glad you did. Satisfaction is being occupied with joy. Satisfaction is knowing God has vindicated you from a life of shame or guilt- and has deemed you cleansed, forgiven, and loved.
There is nothing noble in laboring and creating only to be unsatisfied with the results. I, for one, intend to look like the cat who ate the canary, going around with a smile of delight on my lips.
When people ask me why I look so happy, I'm going to answer with the shocking truth-
"Cause I'm satisfied."
This all comes from having grown up in a home where my Dad, having come from Bolivia to the U.S. at the age of 19, learned the English language - and learned it well. And God help his kids if they didn't speak the English language properly! There was never any lazy questions allowed in our home. If you ever asked,"Dad, what does this word mean?" he would always say "Go get the dictionary and look it up." He knew more vocabulary words than the average man, but he wouldn't let us ride on his coat tails. He wanted us to learn the meaning of words. He wanted us to put our efforts into knowing the power of each word we spoke.
Words are powerful. Certain words, clearly understood, turn on light bulbs in our head. Certain words , lately, are really sticking in my head. It's like God is saying "GET THIS!"
The word for today is satisfaction. I love "s" words- they're simply scintillating and smashing!(Some words are just fun to speak, period.)
But this word- satisfaction- seems to get Christians up in arms. It seems like a selfish word or a sinful word. People immediately think of sexual connotation or of selfish endeavors in getting satisfaction. But I love this word- and God does too!
"A man will be satisfied with good by the fruit of his mouth, and the recompense of a man's hands will be rendered to him." Prov.12:14
Wiktionary describes the meaning of satisfaction:
satisfaction
- fulfillment of a need or desire.
- the pleasure obtained by such fulfillment.
- the source of such gratification.
- reparation for an injury or loss.
- vindication for a wrong suffered.
18 Then I realized that it is good and proper for a man to eat and drink, and to find satisfaction in his toilsome labor under the sun during the few days of life God has given him—for this is his lot. 19 Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to accept his lot and be happy in his work—this is a gift of God. 20 He seldom reflects on the days of his life, because God keeps him occupied with gladness of heart. Eccl. 5:18-20
Your heritage and your inheritance is satisfaction. Satisfaction is something you can get- it comes with the sweat of your brow, the work of your hands, the words from your lips. Speak well, speak kindly, and you will be satisfied you did. Write, create, draw or express yourself in an artistic way, and you'll be glad you did. Satisfaction is being occupied with joy. Satisfaction is knowing God has vindicated you from a life of shame or guilt- and has deemed you cleansed, forgiven, and loved.
There is nothing noble in laboring and creating only to be unsatisfied with the results. I, for one, intend to look like the cat who ate the canary, going around with a smile of delight on my lips.
When people ask me why I look so happy, I'm going to answer with the shocking truth-
"Cause I'm satisfied."
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Calling it Done! Before it is
I have found that there are three stages in every great work of God: first, it is impossible, then it is difficult, then it is done. J. Hudson Taylor
Marybeth Whalen, of Proverbs 31 ministry, has this quote on the bottom of her e-mail, and it spoke to my heart today. This is what I have been conversing with God about lately. Things have been seemingly impossible and difficult. I've been feeling like I can't get ahead. I don't want to self-sabotage what God has me starting.
I've been talking to God about how to DO this thing of "by faith". God is telling me He wants me Calling it out, and calling it done!! What is the it? The work He has called you to, the dream of your heart, the labor of your soul.
"He shall see the labor of his soul and be satisfied..." Isaiah 53:11
What this means may be better described in the Message version of this verse:
"Out of that terrible travail of soul,
he'll see that it's worth it and be glad he did it.
Through what he experienced, my righteous one, my servant,
will make many "righteous ones,"
as he himself carries the burden of their sins."
Christ foresaw the results of His labor on the cross- He could see ahead that it was worth it to die as a ransom for our souls. Can you see ahead, in what you are laboring in, and can you see already- it's worth it?!
Calling it done- before it is done- is not a magic formula or a "health n wealth" pronouncement. Calling it done is walking out your calling with an eye toward the fulfillment, with a smile in anticipation of the reason for the work you do. He who has called you is faithful, and He will help you to do what He's called you to.
One of the most powerful sentences Christ ever uttered is "It is finished!" And it was completed- His death on the cross secured our eternal futures. But Christ knew it was finished even before He died on the cross, because He knew HE WOULD DO IT. He would go to the cross. He would obey the Father. He would see the labor of His soul and be satisfied.
The Rolling Stones sang "I can't get no satisfaction"- but let me tell you, I can. I will be satisfied to walk with Him, run when He says to, do it while trembling but do it afraid! I will see the labor of my soul and be satisfied that I gave my all for His Kingdom purposes.
I see it ahead, and it is finished.
Marybeth Whalen, of Proverbs 31 ministry, has this quote on the bottom of her e-mail, and it spoke to my heart today. This is what I have been conversing with God about lately. Things have been seemingly impossible and difficult. I've been feeling like I can't get ahead. I don't want to self-sabotage what God has me starting.
I've been talking to God about how to DO this thing of "by faith". God is telling me He wants me Calling it out, and calling it done!! What is the it? The work He has called you to, the dream of your heart, the labor of your soul.
"He shall see the labor of his soul and be satisfied..." Isaiah 53:11
What this means may be better described in the Message version of this verse:
"Out of that terrible travail of soul,
he'll see that it's worth it and be glad he did it.
Through what he experienced, my righteous one, my servant,
will make many "righteous ones,"
as he himself carries the burden of their sins."
Christ foresaw the results of His labor on the cross- He could see ahead that it was worth it to die as a ransom for our souls. Can you see ahead, in what you are laboring in, and can you see already- it's worth it?!
Calling it done- before it is done- is not a magic formula or a "health n wealth" pronouncement. Calling it done is walking out your calling with an eye toward the fulfillment, with a smile in anticipation of the reason for the work you do. He who has called you is faithful, and He will help you to do what He's called you to.
One of the most powerful sentences Christ ever uttered is "It is finished!" And it was completed- His death on the cross secured our eternal futures. But Christ knew it was finished even before He died on the cross, because He knew HE WOULD DO IT. He would go to the cross. He would obey the Father. He would see the labor of His soul and be satisfied.
The Rolling Stones sang "I can't get no satisfaction"- but let me tell you, I can. I will be satisfied to walk with Him, run when He says to, do it while trembling but do it afraid! I will see the labor of my soul and be satisfied that I gave my all for His Kingdom purposes.
I see it ahead, and it is finished.
Monday, August 06, 2007
Dirty Feet, Weary Travelers
My daughter Abby decided to give me a foot rub last night (I think she's still feeling grateful for the midnight rescue!), and she began with washing my feet. I was half-reading a book, and listening to her chat away about the day as she rubbed my dirty, hot, tired feet with her wet towel.
"Hey, I'm like Jesus! I'm washing your feet!" she exclaimed with a sudden revelation that she was being a true servant as well as sweet. (She already knew she was being sweet because I kept telling her so!)
She seemed truly amazed that she wound up doing something "good" that occurred, often, in the Bible. Something we don't do much of, for others, because frankly- it's a bit awkward in today's society. I don't mind (well, actually I MORE than don't mind) my daughter washing my feet because she and I love "spa day" at home. We laugh and chat and giggle together when we do pedicures or facial masks in the privacy of our home.
But washing feet for someone I don't know? Does the Bible really want me to do that today? Some of us have tried this in small fellowship groups and the results have been mixed: experiences of real fellowship and tenderness, experiences of awkwardness and "this is weird!-
and that's okay.
I think we need to get back to the purpose of the foot washing: it was to relieve the distress of the weary, dirty, tired traveler in Biblical times. The foot washing was done by servants used to handling "the dirty work" of tasks that were crucial to survival and comfort: servants cooked, cleaned, and washed feet. It wasn't meant to be this deeply moving spiritual experience with eyes locked on each other and solemn silence all around. It was ministering to the needs of the weary traveler who had come in the door from God-only-knows-where.
Today, we have a lot of people coming from all kinds of tough backgrounds and stressful situations. They walk in through our front door or into our churches and they need the equivalent of a foot washing- and they need it now.
Forget bringing out a pan of warm water and a cloth. Instead, give them what they need: help with getting rid of the soil of the world grinding into their souls, the coolness of something that relieves their thirst for something they haven't yet found, and rest for their frantic minds that can't solve the problems that persistently press in to their lives. You've got what they need- and today, it isn't a actual foot washing- it's more than that.
4[The Servant of God says] The Lord God has given Me the tongue of a disciple and of one who is taught, that I should know how to speak a word in season to him who is weary. Isaiah 50:4 Ampl.
When I am tired and feeling sullied by the world and overwhelmed by life, nothing ministers to my soul more than an encouraging word, a prophetic word that points me forward, or the words of a friend who is lifting up my burdens to God and calling down God's grace on me.
There's a lot more than dirty feet at stake here. Souls are waiting to hear a word that will set them free, a word that will cause them to look up and see ...HE is there.
(Special thanks go out to all my friends who've "washed my feet" and have encouraged my soul,especially my Proverbs 31 "speaker" friends!You all do know how to Speak a word in season!)
"Hey, I'm like Jesus! I'm washing your feet!" she exclaimed with a sudden revelation that she was being a true servant as well as sweet. (She already knew she was being sweet because I kept telling her so!)
She seemed truly amazed that she wound up doing something "good" that occurred, often, in the Bible. Something we don't do much of, for others, because frankly- it's a bit awkward in today's society. I don't mind (well, actually I MORE than don't mind) my daughter washing my feet because she and I love "spa day" at home. We laugh and chat and giggle together when we do pedicures or facial masks in the privacy of our home.
But washing feet for someone I don't know? Does the Bible really want me to do that today? Some of us have tried this in small fellowship groups and the results have been mixed: experiences of real fellowship and tenderness, experiences of awkwardness and "this is weird!-
and that's okay.
I think we need to get back to the purpose of the foot washing: it was to relieve the distress of the weary, dirty, tired traveler in Biblical times. The foot washing was done by servants used to handling "the dirty work" of tasks that were crucial to survival and comfort: servants cooked, cleaned, and washed feet. It wasn't meant to be this deeply moving spiritual experience with eyes locked on each other and solemn silence all around. It was ministering to the needs of the weary traveler who had come in the door from God-only-knows-where.
Today, we have a lot of people coming from all kinds of tough backgrounds and stressful situations. They walk in through our front door or into our churches and they need the equivalent of a foot washing- and they need it now.
Forget bringing out a pan of warm water and a cloth. Instead, give them what they need: help with getting rid of the soil of the world grinding into their souls, the coolness of something that relieves their thirst for something they haven't yet found, and rest for their frantic minds that can't solve the problems that persistently press in to their lives. You've got what they need- and today, it isn't a actual foot washing- it's more than that.
4[The Servant of God says] The Lord God has given Me the tongue of a disciple and of one who is taught, that I should know how to speak a word in season to him who is weary. Isaiah 50:4 Ampl.
When I am tired and feeling sullied by the world and overwhelmed by life, nothing ministers to my soul more than an encouraging word, a prophetic word that points me forward, or the words of a friend who is lifting up my burdens to God and calling down God's grace on me.
There's a lot more than dirty feet at stake here. Souls are waiting to hear a word that will set them free, a word that will cause them to look up and see ...HE is there.
(Special thanks go out to all my friends who've "washed my feet" and have encouraged my soul,especially my Proverbs 31 "speaker" friends!You all do know how to Speak a word in season!)
Friday, August 03, 2007
Charging Up the Mountain
Charging up the mountain, last night, all I could think was I've got to get to my daughter! She had called me from camp, just an hour earlier, sobbing into the phone- she was sick to her stomach, overheated, and overwrought. My heart not only went out to her- I went out to her!
When the cell phone connection suddenly died, while I was trying to find out how ill she was, I panicked over not being able to hear her voice, and more than that- knowing she needed to hear mine. I grabbed a printout from map quest and ran to the car. Give me God-speed I prayed.
I wasn't sure if I could remember the long winding route up the nearby mountain to her camp.
I made it half way there, and then got lost. It was pitch black out, and there were few lit buildings on the road. At a traffic light, I saw a man on a motorcycle pull up. I opened my window and called out to him. He's either going to attack me or help me- let it be the latter, Lord! When another guy walked up, from nowhere, I then had two people to point me on my way up the mountain .
I was practically driving a rocket - that's how steep the climb was up the mountain. There were few street lights and lots of curves. Oh, Lord- you know how all those times when I got mad and cried out 'Just take me home now, Lord'- well, I don't mean it. Please let me not fall off this mountain! I want to live! Darkness and fear makes an honest woman of us all!
I finally made it to the camp, and there was my daughter at the doorway. I hugged her tight. She felt very warm, but I knew she'd be fine. Everything would be okay. And it is.
I don't know why I go shooting out into the dark every time I hear a distress call- but I can't help it. I don't like the idea of anyone being alone and sick and afraid. There are too many women battling depression, anxiety and fear- who feel so alone. The battle is not what I want to liberate them from- I can't always take away the things that cause distress in women's lives. But I don't want anyone to feel alone in the battle. There's nothing worse than a lone soldier who feels left behind by the battalion. There's nothing so traumatizing as crying out for help- and no one can hear you.
But there IS Someone who always hears your every cry, Someone who not only can get up the mountain every time- but HE made the mountain. He can also move it, too- with just one word. So can you.
Yet, the biggest mountain we should want to move is the mountain that keeps someone from seeing and experiencing the love of God.
"If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 1 Cor 13:2
Moving mountains or charging up them...it's all in a day's work for a mom, for any woman who is out to share the love of Christ with those who need His hug.
When the cell phone connection suddenly died, while I was trying to find out how ill she was, I panicked over not being able to hear her voice, and more than that- knowing she needed to hear mine. I grabbed a printout from map quest and ran to the car. Give me God-speed I prayed.
I wasn't sure if I could remember the long winding route up the nearby mountain to her camp.
I made it half way there, and then got lost. It was pitch black out, and there were few lit buildings on the road. At a traffic light, I saw a man on a motorcycle pull up. I opened my window and called out to him. He's either going to attack me or help me- let it be the latter, Lord! When another guy walked up, from nowhere, I then had two people to point me on my way up the mountain .
I was practically driving a rocket - that's how steep the climb was up the mountain. There were few street lights and lots of curves. Oh, Lord- you know how all those times when I got mad and cried out 'Just take me home now, Lord'- well, I don't mean it. Please let me not fall off this mountain! I want to live! Darkness and fear makes an honest woman of us all!
I finally made it to the camp, and there was my daughter at the doorway. I hugged her tight. She felt very warm, but I knew she'd be fine. Everything would be okay. And it is.
I don't know why I go shooting out into the dark every time I hear a distress call- but I can't help it. I don't like the idea of anyone being alone and sick and afraid. There are too many women battling depression, anxiety and fear- who feel so alone. The battle is not what I want to liberate them from- I can't always take away the things that cause distress in women's lives. But I don't want anyone to feel alone in the battle. There's nothing worse than a lone soldier who feels left behind by the battalion. There's nothing so traumatizing as crying out for help- and no one can hear you.
But there IS Someone who always hears your every cry, Someone who not only can get up the mountain every time- but HE made the mountain. He can also move it, too- with just one word. So can you.
| And He said to them, "... if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move;and nothing will be impossible to you. Matt 17:20 | |
Yet, the biggest mountain we should want to move is the mountain that keeps someone from seeing and experiencing the love of God.
"If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 1 Cor 13:2
Moving mountains or charging up them...it's all in a day's work for a mom, for any woman who is out to share the love of Christ with those who need His hug.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Fan the Flame
I have a confession to make: I've asked God for something, and it might make life slightly unbearable for those closest to me who will feel the heat. Don't worry- I didn't ask God for something bad- it's all in His will.
Here's how it happened. A couple Sundays ago was Motorcycle Sunday at our church. God bless these wild-lookin' guys (and gals) who come roaring into the church parking lot. You do know, don't you, that these burly men are not only big and husky on the outside, but they've got these big hearts for God as well. The preacher had on a green bandana around his head (loved the color- "excuse me, sir, where did you buy that?") and the power of God pulsing through him as he preached.
We don't normally have a lot of upfront altar calls or "Come for prayer up front here"- we're a bit understated in our expression of faith, in our weeping over sin, in our calling out for God to help us. (Check with me in a year and I hope to tell you God has blown the lid off our church!)
So when the altar call came, and the motorcycle preacher calls his "ministry team" to stand in the front to pray for people, you could have your choice of big, scary looking men to pray over you- if you went forward.
Go forward, I did. I mean, nothing against demure, refined women with conservative dress and sweet smiles, but I'd like the chance of something a little more powerful than that to rub off on me. (But I do know some wild, all-out older women of God that you feel a little shaky when they head towards you to pray over you! More on that another time. Just remind me to tell you about Halley).
So there I am, walking up to this burly guy and his buddy next to him.
"What do you want prayer for?" they ask.
"I'd like prayer for..." I hesitated.
"Yes?" (Now remember, we're practically shouting as the worship team is blasting their music
behind us.)
"I'd like prayer for....boldness," I said.
The one guy smiles at me, nodding his head in agreement, as if to say "Little lady, you aint seen nothing yet!"
And then they prayed for me. Prayed- I don't know what- but I walked back to my seat thinking, "Oh God, I'm already a bit much for my family to handle- what'll I become next?"
I'll tell you what I'm going to become. I'm going to become a KEEPER.
"That good thing which was committed to you, keep by the Holy Spirit who dwells in us" 2 Tim. 1:14
I'm also going to become bold (makes sense, since I asked for it!) about what's IN me, and I'm going to "stir it up" alot.
"Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands." 2 Tim 1:6
Or as the Amplified version words it "stir up-rekindle the embers, fan the flame and keep burning- the gracious gift of God, the inner fire that is in you..."
Now if I do this, and I propose to do so, I can't make any disclaimers about potential liability to those around me. As that famous saying goes "When you're on fire for the Lord, people will come around to watch you burn."
Don't worry- I don't plan on doing anything needlessly wild for the sake of trying to SHOW that I'm bold. I know boldness isn't in wearing a leather skirt and riding a harley down the street- although I will do so if required by the Lord. As well as climb to a mountain peak "and there proclaim,'Behold Your God!'"
If you'd like to join me in this venture into boldness- for His Sake, and the sake of all those who need to know His power to overcome- then, as the Living version words it "I want to remind you to stir into flame the strength and boldness that is in you...."
And now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to get another log for the fire.
Here's how it happened. A couple Sundays ago was Motorcycle Sunday at our church. God bless these wild-lookin' guys (and gals) who come roaring into the church parking lot. You do know, don't you, that these burly men are not only big and husky on the outside, but they've got these big hearts for God as well. The preacher had on a green bandana around his head (loved the color- "excuse me, sir, where did you buy that?") and the power of God pulsing through him as he preached.
We don't normally have a lot of upfront altar calls or "Come for prayer up front here"- we're a bit understated in our expression of faith, in our weeping over sin, in our calling out for God to help us. (Check with me in a year and I hope to tell you God has blown the lid off our church!)
So when the altar call came, and the motorcycle preacher calls his "ministry team" to stand in the front to pray for people, you could have your choice of big, scary looking men to pray over you- if you went forward.
Go forward, I did. I mean, nothing against demure, refined women with conservative dress and sweet smiles, but I'd like the chance of something a little more powerful than that to rub off on me. (But I do know some wild, all-out older women of God that you feel a little shaky when they head towards you to pray over you! More on that another time. Just remind me to tell you about Halley).
So there I am, walking up to this burly guy and his buddy next to him.
"What do you want prayer for?" they ask.
"I'd like prayer for..." I hesitated.
"Yes?" (Now remember, we're practically shouting as the worship team is blasting their music
behind us.)
"I'd like prayer for....boldness," I said.
The one guy smiles at me, nodding his head in agreement, as if to say "Little lady, you aint seen nothing yet!"
And then they prayed for me. Prayed- I don't know what- but I walked back to my seat thinking, "Oh God, I'm already a bit much for my family to handle- what'll I become next?"
I'll tell you what I'm going to become. I'm going to become a KEEPER.
"That good thing which was committed to you, keep by the Holy Spirit who dwells in us" 2 Tim. 1:14
I'm also going to become bold (makes sense, since I asked for it!) about what's IN me, and I'm going to "stir it up" alot.
"Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands." 2 Tim 1:6
Or as the Amplified version words it "stir up-rekindle the embers, fan the flame and keep burning- the gracious gift of God, the inner fire that is in you..."
Now if I do this, and I propose to do so, I can't make any disclaimers about potential liability to those around me. As that famous saying goes "When you're on fire for the Lord, people will come around to watch you burn."
Don't worry- I don't plan on doing anything needlessly wild for the sake of trying to SHOW that I'm bold. I know boldness isn't in wearing a leather skirt and riding a harley down the street- although I will do so if required by the Lord. As well as climb to a mountain peak "and there proclaim,'Behold Your God!'"
If you'd like to join me in this venture into boldness- for His Sake, and the sake of all those who need to know His power to overcome- then, as the Living version words it "I want to remind you to stir into flame the strength and boldness that is in you...."
And now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to get another log for the fire.
Monday, July 30, 2007
We Can All Shine
My husband and I and our two kids were invited over to my parents' house last night for a cook out. They had invited a gentleman that they had recently befriended. Over delicious corn on the cob from my brother's organic garden, my mom proceeds to tell this man about an episode of mine from my younger days. WHY she wanted to talk about an embarrassing moment of my youth, I don't know! You have to understand- my mom was an entertainer- and once an entertainer, ALWAYS an entertainer. I, on the other hand, was a very quiet child growing up, and that's why my Mom found it fascinating that one day, when I was about twelve, I invited my parents into the living room to hear me sing a song.
"Dim the lights"- I told them, trying to cast a smokey mood- and how I knew that a"smokey" atmosphere is what I needed, I don't know! I sang them a song- I think it was Killing Me Softly, or something romantic like that."What do you think?" I asked, when the song ended. They tried not to laugh at me, then, and "admiring" my vocal presentation they quickly returned to the kitchen to prepare supper.
That was years ago- and I mean years!- but they don't let me forget that I wanted my shot at stardom. But doesn't everybody want a chance to shine? Doesn't everybody want to belt out a song once in a while?
Trust me, I'm done trying to perform for people- but I do still sing for them. I am known for singing out silly lines from songs at my workshops I teach- in order to help women get the message. I'll do anything to convey a message of hope in this somewhat disturbing and delightful world we live in.
"Then our mouths were filled with laughter and our tongues with joyful songs. Then the nations said, "The LORD has done spectacular things for them." Psalms 162: 2.
Yes, God really has done spectacular things in my life, and I'm sure in yours too. I think I feel a song coming on!! Get the microphone ready!
"Dim the lights"- I told them, trying to cast a smokey mood- and how I knew that a"smokey" atmosphere is what I needed, I don't know! I sang them a song- I think it was Killing Me Softly, or something romantic like that."What do you think?" I asked, when the song ended. They tried not to laugh at me, then, and "admiring" my vocal presentation they quickly returned to the kitchen to prepare supper.
That was years ago- and I mean years!- but they don't let me forget that I wanted my shot at stardom. But doesn't everybody want a chance to shine? Doesn't everybody want to belt out a song once in a while?
Trust me, I'm done trying to perform for people- but I do still sing for them. I am known for singing out silly lines from songs at my workshops I teach- in order to help women get the message. I'll do anything to convey a message of hope in this somewhat disturbing and delightful world we live in.
"Then our mouths were filled with laughter and our tongues with joyful songs. Then the nations said, "The LORD has done spectacular things for them." Psalms 162: 2.
Yes, God really has done spectacular things in my life, and I'm sure in yours too. I think I feel a song coming on!! Get the microphone ready!
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Vocabulary Victory
I've been telling my seventeen year old that he needs to know what "lugubrious" and "salacious" mean- I have a feeling he'll see them on the SATS he is taking again in October. When I was in high school, I was in Advanced Placement English- and we had twenty vocabulary words a week to memorize. I remember those two words from that time- and I think I even had them on my SAT exam. Lugubrious means mournful, but I couldn't remember what salacious means until I looked it up and found it means lustful or obscene. Yuk. Stay away from anything that is salacious!
But my vocabulary word today is a word that's in my blog address: Champion. It's been on my mind again. Usually people think champion means someone who wins, who is the first place victor. And that's the hard truth- there are situations where there can only be one winner. Why is it that we have to have first place, second place, etc- when it comes to winning?! Can't everyone win?
If you look up the definition of champion in Webster's New World, though, you find that the first definition given is this "One who fights for another or for a cause; defender" and then the second definition listed has to do with being first place winner. Love the order of that!
The verb form of champion is "to fight for, defend, support"- as in "Let me champion your dreams!" And that's what I want to do.There's enough people competing for first place, as though winning at the expense of others feeling lost and last, was okay. It's not.
There are too many people who feel they are without a champion for their dreams. They wish they had a perpetual cheerleader to cheer them on. I can understand that feeling. But remember-
So if you need to know just ONE vocabulary word for the week, know what "champion" means-
because you have one, and so do I.
I hear Him calling me onward....right now.
But my vocabulary word today is a word that's in my blog address: Champion. It's been on my mind again. Usually people think champion means someone who wins, who is the first place victor. And that's the hard truth- there are situations where there can only be one winner. Why is it that we have to have first place, second place, etc- when it comes to winning?! Can't everyone win?
If you look up the definition of champion in Webster's New World, though, you find that the first definition given is this "One who fights for another or for a cause; defender" and then the second definition listed has to do with being first place winner. Love the order of that!
The verb form of champion is "to fight for, defend, support"- as in "Let me champion your dreams!" And that's what I want to do.There's enough people competing for first place, as though winning at the expense of others feeling lost and last, was okay. It's not.
There are too many people who feel they are without a champion for their dreams. They wish they had a perpetual cheerleader to cheer them on. I can understand that feeling. But remember-
"The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to theThe race is for everyone - and run it well- because His eyes are on you, His thoughts are toward you (Jer 29:11) and God's plans are for your good. He is championing your dreams- and they're dreams that HE put in your heart.
strong." Eccl. 9:11
So if you need to know just ONE vocabulary word for the week, know what "champion" means-
because you have one, and so do I.
I hear Him calling me onward....right now.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
From a Low Point
Colliding realities. A mom with faith, some fear, and hope; a teenage son with dreams , some disasters, and a communication style unique to him. Sometimes I look at my son and think We're so much a like, how can we not understand each other?
I think it's because often I am speaking to him with all my hopes and dreams for his great future in the back of my mind, but not always on my lips. And often he wants to share frustrations and a point of view that threatens to bring me face to face with my fear that I do more harm than good in my parenting.
It is soooo much easier for me to sit down and have a good heart-to-heart talk with my best friend "Mu"- because I never worry whether she understands me (she does) or whether I've harmed her in our relationship ( I probably have at times- I can ramble on and over analyze- and she survives me somehow!).
I don't expect my son to understand how much I want to be there for him, do right by him- and how I know I will fail. But I'm learning the grace of giving myself grace- because that how successful mothers make it. Successful Mothers Surrender. They give up a lot- and give it all up to God. And then try again. If there's one thing I know I can become good at- it's surrendering. God is giving me plenty of chances to do so. And every time I surrender, I still find out, with relief ....
HE is there.
I think it's because often I am speaking to him with all my hopes and dreams for his great future in the back of my mind, but not always on my lips. And often he wants to share frustrations and a point of view that threatens to bring me face to face with my fear that I do more harm than good in my parenting.
It is soooo much easier for me to sit down and have a good heart-to-heart talk with my best friend "Mu"- because I never worry whether she understands me (she does) or whether I've harmed her in our relationship ( I probably have at times- I can ramble on and over analyze- and she survives me somehow!).
I don't expect my son to understand how much I want to be there for him, do right by him- and how I know I will fail. But I'm learning the grace of giving myself grace- because that how successful mothers make it. Successful Mothers Surrender. They give up a lot- and give it all up to God. And then try again. If there's one thing I know I can become good at- it's surrendering. God is giving me plenty of chances to do so. And every time I surrender, I still find out, with relief ....
HE is there.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
From a High Point
Years ago, God impressed on my heart this verse- Get yourself up on a high mountain, O Zion, bearer of good news, Lift up your voice mightily, O Jerusalem, bearer of good news; Lift it up, do not fear. Say to the cities of Judah, "Here is your God!" Is. 40:9
It was a type of call on my life that I heard loud and clear. God was endorsing this: if you've got something good to say, something that will liberate people from fear, then shout it out! And demonstrate the reality that God shows up -even if your knees are shaking. It's as if you're standing up on top of the mountain, yelling out "Don't worry, people! God is with us! He's here!!" and you close your eyes, sweep your arm out, turn your head as you whisper in your soul Oh God, Be there!! -and then open your eyes to see- He IS!!
You don't always have to shout it out to others. I talk to myself ....a lot. It's not in my sleep that I call out stuff- it's in the day light that I do it. I've got to. I've got to charge my soul "Hope in the Lord!" I've got to do my worshipping-dish-towel dance (oh, you'd love to see this!!) and shout out how great God is. I've got to declare to myself, "Behold your God!" And then I turn around and see-
He is there.
It was a type of call on my life that I heard loud and clear. God was endorsing this: if you've got something good to say, something that will liberate people from fear, then shout it out! And demonstrate the reality that God shows up -even if your knees are shaking. It's as if you're standing up on top of the mountain, yelling out "Don't worry, people! God is with us! He's here!!" and you close your eyes, sweep your arm out, turn your head as you whisper in your soul Oh God, Be there!! -and then open your eyes to see- He IS!!
You don't always have to shout it out to others. I talk to myself ....a lot. It's not in my sleep that I call out stuff- it's in the day light that I do it. I've got to. I've got to charge my soul "Hope in the Lord!" I've got to do my worshipping-dish-towel dance (oh, you'd love to see this!!) and shout out how great God is. I've got to declare to myself, "Behold your God!" And then I turn around and see-
He is there.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Dignity
Dignity. I've seen this word used in describing how someone died- "with dignity" or how someone carried themselves "with dignity". I'm not sure we Christians use this word too often, because it sounds like it leans toward aristocracy or high-brow living or stoic, determined living above pain.
Why am I talking about this word? Sunday afternoon, (remember, my day of rest?!), my husband Bill and I were talking heart to heart, challenging each other with God's admonition to press forward, go onward, go higher. Bill said "The word that comes to me is dignity. I think God wants us to conducts ourselves and think about ourselves with dignity- no matter how we might be tempted to feel about ourselves." We had been chatting about the highs and the lows of our lives, our experiences in ministry and our experiences with challenging situations and people. "I've seen fire and I've seen rain" James Taylor sang, and he was right. Psalm 66 tells us God even LETS people ride over our heads- but that He also brings us out to a place of abundance.
Wikipedia discusses dignity and when I read these words I was struck by the truth of the definition, the application...:
"According to Webster's Dictionary, the word dignity means the quality of being worthy of esteem or honor; worthiness; i.e., the quality of being highly valued....
Why am I talking about this word? Sunday afternoon, (remember, my day of rest?!), my husband Bill and I were talking heart to heart, challenging each other with God's admonition to press forward, go onward, go higher. Bill said "The word that comes to me is dignity. I think God wants us to conducts ourselves and think about ourselves with dignity- no matter how we might be tempted to feel about ourselves." We had been chatting about the highs and the lows of our lives, our experiences in ministry and our experiences with challenging situations and people. "I've seen fire and I've seen rain" James Taylor sang, and he was right. Psalm 66 tells us God even LETS people ride over our heads- but that He also brings us out to a place of abundance.
Wikipedia discusses dignity and when I read these words I was struck by the truth of the definition, the application...:
"According to Webster's Dictionary, the word dignity means the quality of being worthy of esteem or honor; worthiness; i.e., the quality of being highly valued....
Society is free when it has free people. People are free when they have learned the truth about themselves, when they carry the truth with dignity, when they are internally free. Internal freedom is freedom from fear to be judged,....freedom from doubts about dignity....Society knows freedom when its people know dignity."
I got thinking about God's Society- His Kingdom people- and the application of the above definition. God's Kingdom should be characterized by dignity and value and freedom. Galatians 5:1 New Life Version tells us Christ made us free. Stay that way. Plain and simple. One way to walk in His freedom is to continually respect the Word of God, respect the Work of God, and respect, specifically, His marvelous work in your life.
My father coached high school and college soccer for 30 years. One of his favorite exclamations that he'd call out when watching his players try to receive the ball and botch up the pass was
"Respect the ball! Respect the ball!" He wanted the players to think higher of their capability to play well, and to look at the soccer ball as being worthy of being passed and kicked in a manner of respect and good execution.
I feel like God is speaking a message of respect and dignity into my life. I can hear the lyrics Aretha Franklin sang "R-E_S_P_E_C_T! Find out what it means to me...." Here's what I hear the Holy Spirit whispering to me "Treat yourself with respect. Walk in Dignity. Walk freely in My path for you. Stay free, and share the message of my marvelous freedom with those who walk with head down, hands limp, eyes clouded with despair."
Hebrews 12:12,13 tells us Therefore, lift up the hands that hang down and the feeble knees,and make straight paths for your feet, so that which is lame may not be dislocated, but rather be healed.
We have all had experiences where our sense of worth and value was not strengthened but rather wounded or dislocated even. How does healing come? A dear new friend of mine, Gabie, advised that God "will give you the strategy and the strength to get out from under." Get out from under what? From any lie that speaks "you have no value, no worth, no future."
May today be a day where the dignity ( "a certain worth or value") of being a beloved child of God rules in our life, our walk, and most of all in our sense of who we are. What is your certain worth or value? Beloved sister or brother, it is in Him and because of Him- and it is exceedingly above what we could ever ask or imagine. And higher than that, even, is His inestimable glory.
Son Shine on My Soul Today, The Worthy Lamb has Made a Way .... for me.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Sabbath Rest for the Soul
It's Sunday, a day of rest. I've come home from Church, and I consider how I am not at rest about many things in my life: I am not at rest about my son's driving (can I be frank? he's a lousy driver! But he'll get there, I know), I am not at rest about the hopes and dreams I have and the colliding reality which threatens to taunt me daily.
I remember the words of that beautiful hymn-
I am resting, resting, resting,
in the joy of what Thou art,
I am finding out thy goodness
of thy loving heart
Such sweetness of truth for the soul. I need to rest in HIS goodness, His perspective of my life- of where I've been and where He's taking me.
There is a time to be at rest, because of what you see, in the here and now. And then there's a time of rest for what will be-in His "here and now"- His perspective.
I choose to be at rest today. If I have to augment that truth with an afternoon nap
(good luck to me!) and with a nice juicey session reading a beautiful cook book (this gets my creative juices going) then so be it.
I am finding out the goodness of His loving heart.
I remember the words of that beautiful hymn-
I am resting, resting, resting,
in the joy of what Thou art,
I am finding out thy goodness
of thy loving heart
Such sweetness of truth for the soul. I need to rest in HIS goodness, His perspective of my life- of where I've been and where He's taking me.
There is a time to be at rest, because of what you see, in the here and now. And then there's a time of rest for what will be-in His "here and now"- His perspective.
I choose to be at rest today. If I have to augment that truth with an afternoon nap
(good luck to me!) and with a nice juicey session reading a beautiful cook book (this gets my creative juices going) then so be it.
I am finding out the goodness of His loving heart.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Give My Regards
Swimming lessons for my daughter, Abby, every morning; sunshine today and gentle breezes instead of oppressive humidity- this is summer, finally. And I'm hoping it's a summertime for my soul, as well. No more dark nights of the soul. I'm basking in the Son shine, and cultivating the soil for my dreams.
Here's my to do list, today: call Dad and finally do that Father's Day lunch I promised, get my teenage son to attend to all his tasks (including driving school, getting his license, so that I can have my gray hair every time he's out on the road!), pay bills-remembering to thank God that we are able to make a living), decide whether to sell this house and go to work on another fixer-upper. Why not make it move #23 or is it 24? I've lost track on the number of moves we've made. And I will write a book about that someday.
Feeling homesick for North Carolina- remembering our year down there, when we, like Abraham, "went out, not knowing where he was going".
I'm a New Yorker (upstate, upstate!)but I don't like who we are. We're rough and callous and cold, often. I don't want to fall back into those nasty patterns! I want to remember my southern terms, "bless her heart", and "see y'all" and the looks of grace that were so freely given.
Yesterday I met three truck drivers getting out of a moving van that had "Bridgeport, CT" on it. I called out "Hey! I remember Bridgeport! Thats where I was rushed to the hospital once." "How'd it turn out?" they asked. "My baby lived!!" I shouted with a grin. Abby was right next to me- my miracle baby.
"Give my regards to Bridgeport!" I shouted as they walked away with a smile.
Give my regards to anyone who's been kind and caring in this often dark world.
Here's my to do list, today: call Dad and finally do that Father's Day lunch I promised, get my teenage son to attend to all his tasks (including driving school, getting his license, so that I can have my gray hair every time he's out on the road!), pay bills-remembering to thank God that we are able to make a living), decide whether to sell this house and go to work on another fixer-upper. Why not make it move #23 or is it 24? I've lost track on the number of moves we've made. And I will write a book about that someday.
Feeling homesick for North Carolina- remembering our year down there, when we, like Abraham, "went out, not knowing where he was going".
I'm a New Yorker (upstate, upstate!)but I don't like who we are. We're rough and callous and cold, often. I don't want to fall back into those nasty patterns! I want to remember my southern terms, "bless her heart", and "see y'all" and the looks of grace that were so freely given.
Yesterday I met three truck drivers getting out of a moving van that had "Bridgeport, CT" on it. I called out "Hey! I remember Bridgeport! Thats where I was rushed to the hospital once." "How'd it turn out?" they asked. "My baby lived!!" I shouted with a grin. Abby was right next to me- my miracle baby.
"Give my regards to Bridgeport!" I shouted as they walked away with a smile.
Give my regards to anyone who's been kind and caring in this often dark world.
Monday, July 09, 2007
"Like a bridge over troubled waters, I will ease your mind...." That has to be one of my favorite lines in one of my favorite songs of all time. "I will ease your mind"- oh, how the world is looking for someone who can do that for them- Someone who can settle our frantic thinking, Someone who can take the pondering and wrestling of an anxious mind and with one word- "peace!" make that mind still and quiet.
I know that Someone who can ease your mind. Though I just came back from a mini vacation at the beach, and had glorious moments of refreshment and repose and sun overhead and bad memories behind me,still- no one can ease my mind- nothing can ease my mind- like Jesus.
He speaks- peace!- and I am on the beach of repose, basking under skies of eternal grace and favor.
Peace to you today.
I know that Someone who can ease your mind. Though I just came back from a mini vacation at the beach, and had glorious moments of refreshment and repose and sun overhead and bad memories behind me,still- no one can ease my mind- nothing can ease my mind- like Jesus.
He speaks- peace!- and I am on the beach of repose, basking under skies of eternal grace and favor.
Peace to you today.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
One of my favorite phone calls of the day is when my local library calls me to tell me a book I've requested has come in. To me, when I hear that, I almost hear the words "Your ship has come in!" Why? Because every time I open a book, and read someone's story, someone's account of something, or their struggle to overcome an area of their life ( a self-help book), I feel blessed that I get to learn, or profit, from their experiences.
When someone writes a candid account of an ordeal they went through, and how they felt, what they prayed, and then I find out at the end of the book what treasure of truth they gleaned from that experience, I feel like the wealthiest woman in the world. Someone shared something with me that cost them something- and I get to learn from it if I will be open to the message, open to the lesson.
That's why I love the books of Ecclesiastes and Proverbs. Especially, the book of Ecclesiastes. I get to hear lessons learned from a king's perspective- golden lessons, sparkling nuggets of wisdom encrusted with enduring application.
Now I'm going to pack for a couple days at the beach, and aprt from clean underwear and a bathing suit, you know what I'm going to make sure is at the top of my suitcase: books, books, books.
My ship has come in.
When someone writes a candid account of an ordeal they went through, and how they felt, what they prayed, and then I find out at the end of the book what treasure of truth they gleaned from that experience, I feel like the wealthiest woman in the world. Someone shared something with me that cost them something- and I get to learn from it if I will be open to the message, open to the lesson.
That's why I love the books of Ecclesiastes and Proverbs. Especially, the book of Ecclesiastes. I get to hear lessons learned from a king's perspective- golden lessons, sparkling nuggets of wisdom encrusted with enduring application.
Now I'm going to pack for a couple days at the beach, and aprt from clean underwear and a bathing suit, you know what I'm going to make sure is at the top of my suitcase: books, books, books.
My ship has come in.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
It's been months since I've written, I know...but who was reading anyways?!
But after my time at the Proverbs 31 She Speaks Conference, I am raring to go again- and this includes blogging and reading other blogs. This includes speaking out, speaking up, and speaking light! His light.
I went through a dark season of broken down health, broken down cars, strained relationships...seemed like waves of bad news kept coming. I felt more comforted reading Job than I did the book of Philippians, I'll be honest. If I could say, like Job, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him" I knew I'd be okay. And I knew it wasn't God slaying me, but He was letting my flesh get beat up. That's okay, as long as my soul can drink in His air and breathe.
But after my time at the Proverbs 31 She Speaks Conference, I am raring to go again- and this includes blogging and reading other blogs. This includes speaking out, speaking up, and speaking light! His light.
I went through a dark season of broken down health, broken down cars, strained relationships...seemed like waves of bad news kept coming. I felt more comforted reading Job than I did the book of Philippians, I'll be honest. If I could say, like Job, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him" I knew I'd be okay. And I knew it wasn't God slaying me, but He was letting my flesh get beat up. That's okay, as long as my soul can drink in His air and breathe.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
It's a winter morning, and I am tired of the cold and the snow and what doesn't grow well in the winter- and that's my spunk and my zeal for living. I can do the "live it up" thing in the spring and summer: put sunglasses on, sip ice cold lemonade, go barefoot, and sing crazy songs. But in the winter, the best I can do is get on my stairmaster, in the morning, and exercise for 20 minutes while I blast some gospel music in the background. That's a big accomplishment and a big improvement in my day. Whooeee. Wow. But to take it a step further, I can leave my house, go out into the ice cold weather, and try to smile at grumpy shoppers and try to feel connected to mankind somehow. It doesn't work that well. It was so much easier to be sweet and spunky, even in December, back when we lived in North Carolina for a year.
I long for the Son shine. I need HIS light in me. I need to get my zeal for living turned up to full blast. I need to go onward and upward- even though I feel like I'm just plodding along. I gotta rejoice in hope, be patient in trials, and continue on, praying and growing and sharing what bit I know about living in His light.....
(Romans 12)
I long for the Son shine. I need HIS light in me. I need to get my zeal for living turned up to full blast. I need to go onward and upward- even though I feel like I'm just plodding along. I gotta rejoice in hope, be patient in trials, and continue on, praying and growing and sharing what bit I know about living in His light.....
(Romans 12)
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Don't Forget
Yesterday, September 11th, was a day we don't want to remember, but we can't forget.
It certainly isn't a day that builds faith, as it appears. It was a day when heroes were made that didn't want to be, but had to be; and a day when grief, darkness, and blood seemed to cover the city. And I wasn't even there- I only watched by television.
Today, the sun is out, and I could forget that sometimes evil temporarily prevails. I could forget how some still suffer longing and loneliness because of those they lost. Lost loved ones and lost dreams are the things that shake us to our soul. What can overcome such darkness?
"But may they who love You be like the sun when it rises in full strength" says Judges 5:31b.
We will arise. All those bowed down can rise up with wings as eagles, as it says in Isaiah. The sun comes out. And the Son can never be hidden- even in darkness- for He has overcome the world. We shall too.
There's something about becoming a warrior, when you didn't intend to- I think that's when you really start to live.
It certainly isn't a day that builds faith, as it appears. It was a day when heroes were made that didn't want to be, but had to be; and a day when grief, darkness, and blood seemed to cover the city. And I wasn't even there- I only watched by television.
Today, the sun is out, and I could forget that sometimes evil temporarily prevails. I could forget how some still suffer longing and loneliness because of those they lost. Lost loved ones and lost dreams are the things that shake us to our soul. What can overcome such darkness?
"But may they who love You be like the sun when it rises in full strength" says Judges 5:31b.
We will arise. All those bowed down can rise up with wings as eagles, as it says in Isaiah. The sun comes out. And the Son can never be hidden- even in darkness- for He has overcome the world. We shall too.
There's something about becoming a warrior, when you didn't intend to- I think that's when you really start to live.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
My School
It's the first day of school.My two kids are off, and the house is quiet. I'm chomping at the bit to explore, sift through some thoughts and dreams I have, and contemplate where I'm at. I'm full of thoughts and ideas.
I love Barbara Sher's interpretation of the gifted, multi-faceted learner she calls a Scanner. She looks at this type of person as someone who soaks up all the wonderful things the world has to offer. I understand completely when she says in her book Refuse to Choose, "I just loved learning and wanted to keep on doing it."
1 Peter 1:13 begins with "prepare your minds for action..." I'm preparing, alright.
I'm fueled up, ready to explore and expand my borders. Barbara concludes her intro with this:
"I can't wait to see what you will do with that lovely brain of yours once the gates are thrown open and you're finally free to stretch out to your full speed and explore this big world that you love so much."
Stretching out, gates thrown open, full speed- I like all those words. I feel like I'm off to the first day of school- but this is a new kind of school. This kind of school you get to learn, take chances, make mistakes (anybody remember Miss Frizzle?!)and explore to your heart's content.
This is My school- I'm the Principal, I'm the only student, and I'm even the teacher. My style of teaching is to say, when I'm asked a question (from myself)-
"I'm not sure of the answer, but boy are we going to have fun finding it out!"
I love Barbara Sher's interpretation of the gifted, multi-faceted learner she calls a Scanner. She looks at this type of person as someone who soaks up all the wonderful things the world has to offer. I understand completely when she says in her book Refuse to Choose, "I just loved learning and wanted to keep on doing it."
1 Peter 1:13 begins with "prepare your minds for action..." I'm preparing, alright.
I'm fueled up, ready to explore and expand my borders. Barbara concludes her intro with this:
"I can't wait to see what you will do with that lovely brain of yours once the gates are thrown open and you're finally free to stretch out to your full speed and explore this big world that you love so much."
Stretching out, gates thrown open, full speed- I like all those words. I feel like I'm off to the first day of school- but this is a new kind of school. This kind of school you get to learn, take chances, make mistakes (anybody remember Miss Frizzle?!)and explore to your heart's content.
This is My school- I'm the Principal, I'm the only student, and I'm even the teacher. My style of teaching is to say, when I'm asked a question (from myself)-
"I'm not sure of the answer, but boy are we going to have fun finding it out!"
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
I love it when Faith refuses to die. That's real victory. Grabbing hold of something and not letting go- like Jacob, who wrestled with God and said he wouldn't let go till he was blessed. That's a tenacious spirit. Call it the spirit of a warrior. Call it guts and hope mixed together. Call things that don't yet appear in physical reality as though they already exist. Faith.
I'm after that. I don't make any apologies about it. In a sense,I perceive myself as destitute if I don't have Faith. But with Faith, the life giving well of God's Spirit overflows in me, charges me, causes me to reach out and lay hold of bigger things, larger missions, impossible scenarios- to the human eye. But not to the eye of Faith.
I look out... and I see.
I'm after that. I don't make any apologies about it. In a sense,I perceive myself as destitute if I don't have Faith. But with Faith, the life giving well of God's Spirit overflows in me, charges me, causes me to reach out and lay hold of bigger things, larger missions, impossible scenarios- to the human eye. But not to the eye of Faith.
I look out... and I see.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
It's the middle of August, and the new school year looms before me: I've got pencils and notebooks to buy, new clothes and back packs must be bought, and this isn't even for me! My two kids are probably preparing for the future in a minimal way; I, on the other hand, am racing to get them prepared, thinking of what they need, picturing the homework load that will affect our whole family- because if they have homework, I have homework!
Yet, I am in school too- the school of life, the school of "make your dreams come true- because no one else will do it for you". It's true- I'm piloting the boat, riding the bull, walking the path- whatever metaphor you want to use- and I've got to move myself foward, intentionally, towards the reality I want to experience: fruitful, productive living with all gifts and talents used, ignited, blazing.
I'm in the school of life, and it's not that I get a final grade at the end of my life (I do); it's that I also get a grade for each day I live. Today is going to be an A+ day- not because I won't make mistakes, or crumble momentarily; it's that I will not forget that all I do can be done in love, by grace, pardoned mercifully where I fail, and then touched by Him in such a way that I keep going, I keep riding the bull, holding on....for more than 8 seconds.
Yet, I am in school too- the school of life, the school of "make your dreams come true- because no one else will do it for you". It's true- I'm piloting the boat, riding the bull, walking the path- whatever metaphor you want to use- and I've got to move myself foward, intentionally, towards the reality I want to experience: fruitful, productive living with all gifts and talents used, ignited, blazing.
I'm in the school of life, and it's not that I get a final grade at the end of my life (I do); it's that I also get a grade for each day I live. Today is going to be an A+ day- not because I won't make mistakes, or crumble momentarily; it's that I will not forget that all I do can be done in love, by grace, pardoned mercifully where I fail, and then touched by Him in such a way that I keep going, I keep riding the bull, holding on....for more than 8 seconds.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
I have heard people say, at times, "I'm in a boatload of trouble." You can feel overwhelmed and beseiged by the burden of challenges and tasks that are above and beyond what you feel you are capable of. Rocky seas, a strong wind,and a storm-tossed boat do not make for a settled stomach and a peaceful mindset.
I don't like to feel like I'm in a sea of troubles or challenges, and I certainly don't like to feel alone in a boat. I love how Jesus' disciples in John 6:15-21 experienced the plight that is so common to us today- they were at sea, tossed by the wind, and waiting for Jesus to come to them. It was dark. We can feel like that- that all is dark and overwhelming and too much to handle. I don't think they were feeling faith-filled. But when you are in a boat load of trouble, you don't need feelings of faith, you just need FAITH that Jesus WILL come to you!
And He did. They saw Jesus walking on the sea. (Remember, nothing is too difficult for him!) They were overwhelmed and afraid. He was coming close to their boat, and He said "It is I; do not be afraid." But what happens next is the most reassuring faith-booster of all: they willingly received him, it says, and He gets into the boat, "and Immediately the boat was at the land where they were going." (Jn 6:21)In one instant, they go from storm tossed sea to dry land.
We can go from a sea of trouble, from being stuck in a boat in a storm, and if we invite Jesus into our situation, we can immediately be at peace-
Because He IS our peace.(Eph. 2:14)While we may have challenges still before us, we can immediately be on solid ground, because of Him.
If you are overwhelmed today by a task or a dream to fulfil something great for God's glory, be comforted, be assured, that if you invite Jesus into your situation, you can immediately BE THERE: your destination IS Him, after all.
Sail on.
I don't like to feel like I'm in a sea of troubles or challenges, and I certainly don't like to feel alone in a boat. I love how Jesus' disciples in John 6:15-21 experienced the plight that is so common to us today- they were at sea, tossed by the wind, and waiting for Jesus to come to them. It was dark. We can feel like that- that all is dark and overwhelming and too much to handle. I don't think they were feeling faith-filled. But when you are in a boat load of trouble, you don't need feelings of faith, you just need FAITH that Jesus WILL come to you!
And He did. They saw Jesus walking on the sea. (Remember, nothing is too difficult for him!) They were overwhelmed and afraid. He was coming close to their boat, and He said "It is I; do not be afraid." But what happens next is the most reassuring faith-booster of all: they willingly received him, it says, and He gets into the boat, "and Immediately the boat was at the land where they were going." (Jn 6:21)In one instant, they go from storm tossed sea to dry land.
We can go from a sea of trouble, from being stuck in a boat in a storm, and if we invite Jesus into our situation, we can immediately be at peace-
Because He IS our peace.(Eph. 2:14)While we may have challenges still before us, we can immediately be on solid ground, because of Him.
If you are overwhelmed today by a task or a dream to fulfil something great for God's glory, be comforted, be assured, that if you invite Jesus into your situation, you can immediately BE THERE: your destination IS Him, after all.
Sail on.
Monday, May 15, 2006
A Mother's Day to Remember
Mother's Day was Sunday, yesterday. How does Faith work in terms of preparing for a celebration?
Some People actually need faith when it comes to holiday celebrations- because believe it or not, it requires faith to celebrate. Often an important holiday falls on a day when we don't quite feel "up to snuff." Maybe you don't feel like being joyful when you're singing "Joy to the World" on Christmas Day. Or you don't feel victorious- and it is Easter Sunday morning.
Sometimes our faith needs a bit of tweaking. And it can happen in the most quiet and unexpected ways.
I enjoyed my two children showing their love for me yesterday, on Mother's Day. But I often don't feel victorious in my mothering skills. I can be paranoid that I am ruining my children for life with each misstep I make in parenting a preteen and a teenager. I'm not sure if I've put enough "good" into them so that when they leave our nest, they really will be able to fly, so to speak.
One child showered me with gifts, expressive as her personality is. She let me know how much she loves me. I was touched.
By the end of the day, though, I had not heard much from my teenaged son. I was riddled with doubt and sadness inside- maybe I don't mean much to him anymore. I stopped in his room to check on him before he went to sleep; checked to see if he had a temperature, as he wasn't feeling well all day. As I leaned over him, suddenly he reached up and hugged me, tightly. My heart flooded with love...and renewed faith. He loves me, I thought, as I returned his hug.
And Faith flooded my soul: I can do this thing called Mothering, I thought.
Yes, I can.
Some People actually need faith when it comes to holiday celebrations- because believe it or not, it requires faith to celebrate. Often an important holiday falls on a day when we don't quite feel "up to snuff." Maybe you don't feel like being joyful when you're singing "Joy to the World" on Christmas Day. Or you don't feel victorious- and it is Easter Sunday morning.
Sometimes our faith needs a bit of tweaking. And it can happen in the most quiet and unexpected ways.
I enjoyed my two children showing their love for me yesterday, on Mother's Day. But I often don't feel victorious in my mothering skills. I can be paranoid that I am ruining my children for life with each misstep I make in parenting a preteen and a teenager. I'm not sure if I've put enough "good" into them so that when they leave our nest, they really will be able to fly, so to speak.
One child showered me with gifts, expressive as her personality is. She let me know how much she loves me. I was touched.
By the end of the day, though, I had not heard much from my teenaged son. I was riddled with doubt and sadness inside- maybe I don't mean much to him anymore. I stopped in his room to check on him before he went to sleep; checked to see if he had a temperature, as he wasn't feeling well all day. As I leaned over him, suddenly he reached up and hugged me, tightly. My heart flooded with love...and renewed faith. He loves me, I thought, as I returned his hug.
And Faith flooded my soul: I can do this thing called Mothering, I thought.
Yes, I can.
Monday, February 13, 2006
Faith may move a mountain, but a mountain will not move you. You must take charge of lighting your ignition button. You decide to allow yourself to be motivated, to be moved by your passion for knowing God and seeing His hand in this world. The beauty of being a human is the gift of free will. Will you use your will, today, for good?
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