Two and half days- that's all I have been away. It feels longer than that. I feel like I had a powerful, incredible dream and I woke up profoundly changed. But it wasn't a dream.
We left Thursday afternoon for the airport. When Bill dropped off Alex and me, I went through the motions of getting checked in, going through security, looking for our gate. But deep inside, I also was getting ready to gut this out, this whole trip of helping Alex check out this college. I prepared myself to just get through this trip and return. That was my goal- just get through this, Lauren. Help Alex. Be a good Mom.
But God had something in mind for me, as well as for my son. He had a renewal of sorts in mind for me, a refreshing of my soul. Kentucky soil is a good place for a mini revival to take place- and that's exactly what happened. I am having a hard time writing this because how do you put into words what takes place in someone's spirit? A whooshing sound can describe a wind. The feel of heat can describe the sun. But what describes a soul that comes back to life?
When I get the words I'll be back to share. In the mean time, I'm walking around with a wide grin on my face. I feel like the cat who swallowed the canary. And let me tell you, the canary is still singing inside of me. Nothing is going to shut that bird up.
4 comments:
Praise God!
Attagirl! Thank the Lord for the work he can do at the core of our being! Can't wait to hear your sweet song!
It's amazing what God can do to rekindle a flame. It was an amazing adventure. I'm certain I met my future on Saturday, don't you?
I do not want to shut the bird up either. I am so blessed when I get those times of freedom, of truth and of breakthrough. Being on a farm in Eastern Montana is exactly where this So Cal. Orange County girl needed.
I am so afraid to lose the presence of God, and how does one track the perfection of the Holy Spirit? I feel like that is the only safe place for me. Alone with God, and He is telling me how precious I am. There is really no one I can go to, and it is a lonely place. I wonder if the exact thing God wants for me is to think I am alone, and to really see that He is with me, and I am really hearing Him. I need to work on letting go of all the desires of my heart, and letting Him show me what I am really about, what He can do with me, when I ultimately trust Him and know that He is going to instill in me a deep sense of who He is to me, He is going to make me know that He has a foundation for me that is unshakeable by anyone or anything. I guess that will happen when I keep practicing His presence and seeking Him in my times of great joy and need.
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