After two hours in a refrigerator-like arena, watching my daughter enjoy a time of ice skating with friends, I rushed over to a local eatery to meet my best friend, Mu, and enjoy a hot cup of coffee and an hour or two of chatting. Well, actually, we never chat. It's more like we dig in. We can be like war generals, devising victory plans or discussing past battle losses so as to learn from failures.
The funny thing is that I often catch people looking at us as we're talking intently and I have to question why. Sometimes I can talk too loudly. It could be that. Or sometimes it might be that she and I are laughing so hard, and it can almost look like criminal behavior to be that overjoyed on such a frigid, dismal winter day. It's been near zero degrees, lately, and we northeners are a bit bundled up and cast down in spirits at the same time.
It could also be that people want to figure out what our relationship is all about. We look like friends, laugh like best friends with a long history, discuss strategies like war generals, and communicate as counselor and counselee- with myself being the counselee more often than not.
A lot takes place when we get together, but the biggest things that happens is that we get geared up to go another round. We're like old boxers who don't want to leave the ring without winning- but we haven't gotten there, yet.
Lately I'm just enjoying being me.
This is a recent development in my life, but I now have a new sense of gratefulness and appreciation for how God made me. This is an ironic thing. It's an unexpected thing.
It seems like God has changed the mirror in my bathroom and when I look into it, I now see the funny, the good, the interesting, the unique way He made me. It's like God is standing behind me as I stare in the mirror at myself and He is saying "Like what you see? Cause I do." Now, remember, He is standing behind me while I look in the the mirror so there's this strange sense of looking at myself while seeing Him at the same time. Is that something close to the meaning of "Christ in me, the hope of glory?"
Anyhow, what this all means is that I'm so enjoying the journey, lately. I looked back at my past enough to know that I am not there anymore. I'm in the Now. And before I get to tomorrow, I still will be me- loud voice, laughing, battle scarred but not scared, dancing around in the ring 'cause I'm ready to go another round.
4 comments:
Absolutely loved this post! The visual your "old boxer" depiction conjured up made me laugh so hard my family thought I'd gone over the edge!
Love our talks....and here's to celebrating our ability to draw a crowd!
Love,
Mu
I agree with God. I can see your reflection right here in this post! Beautiful!
Don't ask me why the boxer image came to my mind as I was writing this. It's not a sport I've ever followed. Could be, though, that instead of hearing about my bull riding passion that now I'll be talking about boxing matches!
This is such a great post! I think we get so caught up in battles that we forget that God does care and as we go through the storms, he preserves and protects us. I love the "new image" in the mirror; the same beautiful face, just a more confident you, even with the battle scars. In fact, I would say, for myself, because of the battle scars. thanks for being so transparent.
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